Wednesday, 28 August 2013

IS MASTURBATION A SIN?

IS MASTURBATION A SIN?

MANY PEOPLE ARE STILL VERY AFRAID TO OPENLY DISCUSS SEX AND SEXUAL ISSUES.

IN RECENT DAYS I HAVE HAD 30 - 40 AND 50 COMMENTS ON VARIOUS TOPICS.

MY BLOG YESTERDAY ON PROSTITUTION ATTRACTED ONLY 1 COMMENT ????

MASTURBATION

WHEN I WAS GROWING UP IN CATHOLIC IRELAND MASTURBATION WAS REGARDED AS A VERY BIG SIN. THAT SIN HAD PEOPLE RUNNING TO CONFESSION EVERY DAY OF THE WEEK BEGGING THE PRIEST'S FORGIVENESS. 

IN MY FIRST SEMINARY - CLONLIFFE IN DUBLIN - MASS WAS HELD AT 8 AM EVERY MORNING. AT 7.30 AM THE COLLEGE SPIRITUAL DIRECTOR SAT IN A SMALL ROOM AT THE CHAPEL ENTRANCE TO GIVE ABSOLUTION TO ANY SEMINARIAN WHO HAD MASTURBATED DURING THE NIGHT.

WE STUDENTS DISRESPECTFULLY CALLED IT "WANKERS CORNER"
CLONLIFFE SEMINARY

ARCHBISHOP JOHN CHARLES MC QUAID WHO WAS THE ARCHBISHOP OF DUBLIN TOLD ME ONE TIME THAT IF A SEMINARIAN WAS STILL MASTURBATING AT THE AGE OF 19 HE SHOULD BE DISMISSED FROM THE COLLEGE AS HE WAS NOT SUITABLE MATERIAL FOR THE PRIESTHOOD. 
ARCHBISHOP MC QUAID
OF COURSE I REALISED IN LATER YEARS THAT THE VAST MAJORITY OF PRIESTS MASTURBATED - ESPECIALLY IF THEY DID NOT HAVE SECRET SEXUAL PARTNERS


MASTURBATION IS "NORMAL" AND HEALTHY"

MEDICINE AND SCIENCE TELLS US THAT MASTURBATION IS NORMAL AND HEALTHY.

SURVEYS SHOW US THAT MORE THAN 90% OF MEN AND MORE THAN 70% OF WOMEN MASTURBATE.

SCIENCE TELLS US THAT SOME OF THE GOOD EFFECTS OF MASTURBATION ARE:

1. THE RELEASE OF TENSION AND ANXIETY.
2. IT IS HELPFUL IN DEPRESSION.
3. IT LEADS TO A RISE IN SELF ESTEEM.
4. IT IS QUITE A POWERFUL PROTECTION AGAINST PROSTRATE CANCER.
5. IT LEADS TO REDUCED BLOOD PRESSURE.
6. IT GIVES PEOPLE CONFIDENCE AND EXPERIENCE IN CONTROLLING SEXUAL URGES.

COMPULSIVE MASTURBATION CAN SOMETIMES BE A PROBLEM - BUT NOT BECAUSE IT IS MASTURBATION - BUT BECAUSE OF THE COMPULSIVE ELEMENT.

MASTURBATION CAN BE DANGEROUS FOR PEOPLE WITH SERIOUS HEART DISEASE.

EGYPT:

THE ANCIENT EGYPTIANS BELIEVED THAT ONE OF THE GODS CREATED THE UNIVERSE IN AN ACT OF MASTURBATION. BECAUSE OF THAT THE PHARAOH WAS REQUIRED TO MASTURBATE IN THE NILE ON CEREMONIAL OCCASIONS.

RELIGION AND MASTURBATION:

MANY RELIGIONS CONDEMN MASTURBATION. THEY SAY THAT IS IT IS GIVING INTO SELF INDULGENCE AND THE URGES OF THE FLESH. 

ROMAN CATHOLICISM TEACHES THAT MASTURBATION IS A"GRAVE MORAL DISORDER".

CONCLUSION:

MASTURBATION IS NORMAL AND PSYCHOLOGICALLY HEALTHY. IT IS PARTICULARLY NORMAL DURING TEENAGE YEARS AND DURING PSYCHOSEXUAL DEVELOPMENT.

AND YET SADLY MANY PEOPLE I KNOW - ESPECIALLY PEOPLE BROUGHT UP IN A STRICT ROMAN CATHOLIC ENVIORNMENT REGARD IT AS A SIN AND AS A CAUSE FOR GUILT AND SHAME.  

SOME OLDER BACHELORS FROM RURAL IRELAND HAVE WRITTEN TO ME OVER THE YEARS IN GREAT DISTRESS - FEARING THAT THEIR HABIT WILL BRING THEM TO HELL WHEN THEY DIE !!!


EVEN ONE OR TWO OF THE TEENAGERS WHO COMMENTED ON THIS BLOG A COUPLE OF DAYS AGO FEARED THAT  THEY WERE COMMITTING A SERIOUS SIN THAT CUT THEM OFF FROM GOD

WE REALLY HAVE TO PUT AN END TO THIS AWFUL PREOCCUPATION WE CATHOLICS AND CHRISTIANS SEEM TO HAVE ABOUT SEX.

WE REALLY NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT GOD IS FAR MORE WORRIED ABOUT WAR, WORLD HUNGER, NATURAL DISASTERS, INJUSTICE, KILLING ETC THAN HE IS ABOUT SEX.

SEX IS ONLY A SIN WHEN WE USE OUR SEXUAL POWERS TO "USE" OR "ABUSE".

IN ORDER TO COMMIT A SIN BY MASTURBATING SOMEONE WOULD HAVE TO SAY THE FOLLOWING TO GOD:

"GOD - I AM NOW GOING TO MASTURBATE - AND I AM ONLY MASTURBATING FOR ONE REASON - AND THAT REASON IS TO SHOW CONTEMPT FOR YOU"

OF COURSE WE SHOULD BE CONCERNED ABOUT PEOPLE HAVING SEXUAL PROBLEMS - OR FEELING LONELY, ISOLATED AND FRUSTRATED.

BUT WE SHOULD NOT BE ATTRIBUTING "SIN" TO SOMETHING THAT IS SO NORMAL, SO HEALTHY IN MANY WAYS AND IS ENGAGED IN BY PRIMATES, DOGS, HORSES, GOATS, LIONS, BATS, WALRUSES, SHEEP AND BIRDS.
WOODY ALLEN


I OFTEN THINK OF THE TIME WHEN WOODY ALAN WAS ASKED: "IS SEX OUTSIDE MARRIAGE A SIN"?

HE REPLIED: "ONLY IF ITS NOT DONE RIGHT"

THE GOD WHO CREATED THE VAST, DIVERSE UNIVERSE MUST SOMETIMES WONDER WHY WE MEN AND WOMEN MAKE SUCH A BIG DEAL ABOUT SUCH SMALL MATTERS.

"THE LORD WHO SITS IN THE HEAVENS WILL LAUGH THEM TO SCORN" (Psalm 2:4)







77 comments:

  1. Good sensible healthy approach to a subject that really should not be taboo at all.well thought out and argued piece,we need more of this rational sensible honest approach to peoples sexuality and sexual behaviour.Mike

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  2. Explains why very few priests die of prostrate cancer!!! Gerard Belfast

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    1. As the old saying goes "don't do what we DO, do what we SAY" a bunch of hypocrites, who made up this stupid rule in the first place? perhaps some lonely old guy back in the Dark Ages.

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  3. An answer to the oft-asked question of if masturbation is a sin for believers in Christ Jesus, and what the scriptures teach concerning it.

    1Cor 4:6 (Wey) .. in order to teach you by our example what those words mean, which say, "Nothing beyond what is written!"...
    The Scripture is strangely silent about this universal issue, while not shy about all sorts of other sexual situations and perversions... in great detail concerning sex with animals, etc. Yet the Bible says nothing about masturbation. This is odd, don't you think?

    Some, mistakenly, cite Onan in Gen 38:9 as suggesting that masturbation is a sin. In fact, "onanism" has become a synonym for masturbation. But this is obviously an error, and a rather daft one at that. We know what Onan did, for it is spelled out for us in lurid detail; and we know why it was a sin: he was maliciously using and cheating Tamar in way that was wrong. In any case, what Onan was doing was certainly not masturbating, and you have to be pretty dimwitted to miss this.

    In fact, there is no place in scripture where masturbation is even mentioned, much less forbidden. This is a very odd situation since it is so common a human experience, and given that scripture speaks of other sexual sins (some fairly perverse and rare) without any shyness at all.

    So my conclusion is that it is not a sin and I have yet to hear a convincing arguement and I am very open minded. I would be concerned about those who make it a sin and are interested in the habits of others!!

    George

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    1. For an act to be a grevious sin, it has to be co9mmitted knwingly and willingly on a very serious matter. When I masturbate, I don't fall into any of those conditions.

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  4. To be sure, it is clear from Scripture that illicit sexual fantasies are forbidden, and this is a significant issue with masturbation.

    Matt 5:28-29 (NIV) [Jesus:] "But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell."

    Frank

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  5. Is masturbation a sin?

    I’m 17 and I have been doing it for a long time but I don’t know if I’m hurting God. I have stopped from doing it for about 3 weeks now but I fell attemped every day. Is this a sin? How can I control it?

    Best regards,

    Daniel

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  6. Bishop Pat,

    Good question to ask, and brave of you to ask it.

    The Bible doesn’t say much directly about masturbation. (Some people point to Genesis 38:9, but that’s not really about masturbation.) The Bible doesn’t seem to condemn the actual act of masturbation, but there’s more going on in our minds if we do it.

    On the positive side, the Bible has lots to say about the goodness of sex. (Gen 2:24-25, 1 Cor 7:5, Song of Songs) Sex is part of God’s good creation and sexual urges is not a sign of sin but a part of being human.

    Sex in marriage is good, but any other sexual activity is a distortion of that goodness. That’s why such activities as adultery, casual sex and so on are condemned.

    Masturbation can help us find sexual release when we cannot control our desire nor satisfy it through a marital relationship and in this sense it can be helpful. However it is almost inevitably associated with sexual fantasies and this is where it can go wrong and lead to sin.

    Jesus condemns looking at women or girls in order to lust after them. (Matt 5:28) So perving at chicks, which lots of guys would treat as normal, is a sin and offends God. It’s easy to get sucked into a cycle which fuels sexual desire to the point where it can’t be controlled. Perving at girls at school or at the beach, looking at pornography, worst of all internet porn, all fuel desire.

    When masturbation leads to unhelpful sexual thinking and lust you are sinning and need to do something about it. Make the conscious, aggressive decision to look somewhere else, or go somewhere else, or turn the computer off or whatever it takes! Jesus promises that when we are being tempted, he’ll give us a way out. (1 Cor 10:13)

    Ultimately I think that it is much better to resist the temptation to masurbate as you have been, asking God to help you day by day, and resisting the temptation to perv and treating women as sexual objects.

    It’s good to wonder if you’re hurting God. You’re not. In fact you can’t! God’s grace is big enough to deal with any sin. He sent his son Jesus to die so our sins can be forgiven and we can be His sons. We struggle with sin, but that doesn’t mean we’ve killed our relationship. As God’s sons we can call on Him in prayer to help us in our temptations. I’ve prayed for you as I wrote this, you might pray after you read it.

    Ian - Protestant Thinker


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    1. Well put Ian! For a different view, in the Old Teatament, God's Holy Temple was the Great temple building. Nothin unclean nor impure would ever be allowed inside the temple of the Lord. Even the high priest could only go to the inner sanctuary of the temple but once a year. Enter Jesus Christ and the New Covenant, where WE are now God's Temple, in the words of St.Paul himself. Masturbation, along with any sex outside of marriage defiles our bodies, the living temple of God the Holy Spirit. All scripture is inspired by God, and Paul did not write this from his own whim and fancy. Masturbation is defiling to God the Holy Spirit because it , by virtue the very self-seeking end result, misuses and wastes the seed of man from its intended use, procreation. It is a deliberate misuse of the most precious gift given to human beings. Glad I am NOT this bishop.

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    2. For me, masturbation is not a sin, becausr it causes no harm to anybody.

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    3. To you Anonymous I fully agree, before I married I did it 'all the time' and did not have any guilty feeling whatsoever, however, once I married I stopped doing it and had proper sex with my wife, was off it for 40 years until sadly she died, since then I have resumed what I did before I was married.

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  7. Is masturbating a sin?
    I don't think so.. but.. I'm sure someone here does...

    Ryan

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  8. Yes it is a sin!

    What do you think about when you are doing it?
    You are lusting after someone, that's called covet!

    Yes we all guilty of it!

    If something happened to my wife
    I would rather do that then to commit fortification though,
    sinning againist myself is better
    then causing somebody else to sin!

    I am Muslim though!!

    Ammad

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  9. The act of masturbation in and of itself is not sinful, rather, as the Bishop said, lust is the sin, not masturbation.

    Teenager

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  10. For those of you who think it is wrong, here is a pretty good link to help support your view.
    http://christiananswers.net/q-dml/dml-y011.html

    For those that think it's ok, here's a link to help support your view too.
    http://christianteens.about.com/library/weekly/aa041301a.htm

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    Replies
    1. I love that 2nd website, ha ha, Christianteen.about.com, its seems more like Chritians(teens) about to come LOL

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  11. God Loves all of us in all our shapes and sizes, all our desires and actions!

    Sexuality is a gift, let us be mature in our response to God and live a balanced healthy sexual life.

    Oratory Priest

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  12. I believe this comes with qualifiers. If one is married, I believe that they must have the permission from their spouse for this kind of action, as the Bible says that your body is no longer your own. It's not your own in the first place, for it belongs to God if you are a Christian. I believe if you are unmarried, though it is a natural drive, we are to be living in the spirit. So, it would be wrong, because we would be doing this in the flesh, outside of marriage which is God's natural design for the sexual relationship. Inside of the marriage, if the spouse gives consent for the other to involve themself in such an act, they would be cleared of "sin", as they are not dishonoring their vows to be faithful to their spouse.

    Not sure if I am right though,

    Lionel

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  13. I am thankful that God's Word does not give a direct reference to this subject other than just to say to keep our thoughts in subjection, but the sex drive is right up there with the need to breathe, blink, eat, drink and all the other senses, needful to say that where God's Word is silent then we are obligated to be likewise. Will not be a problem when we are changed and move out of this tent of flesh into a body not made with hands in inheriting a body as Jesus has now, glorified and no limitations.

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  14. Is masturbating to anime or hentai (animated pornography) a sin? becayuse aftetrall.. they arent real people.. please help

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  15. Darn if I know the subject isnt clear in the bible ..it only says if you think of someone (or something) with lust than you have commited a sin.
    But it says nothing of masterbation the act alone.

    Personaly I think its great and in fact I admit I do it myself quite often despite haveing a mate.
    But to me its something normal and natural nothing bad about it but i'm sure others think differantly.
    _________________
    Some days your the windshield.
    Somedays your the bug.

    Thank God for it I think!

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  16. Masturbating is not a sin if you dont think about anything. In this sense, it is more like meditation.

    Its nuts - just enjoy it in a healthy way, practicing Catholic

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  17. Masturbation is not a sin because it feels good. If God had intended masturbation to be a sin, he would have made it a very painful experience, to discourage you from doing it!
    I am not a religious person anyway.

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  18. True, God does not say in the Bible, "Thou shall not masturbate", therefore it's not a sin. Masturbation feels good and is pleasurable, and can relieve stress. God did not intend for human beings to forgo all pleasures in life and to be stressed out all the time. It's a perfectly natural act, and in men, it has been shown that if done regularly, the chance of getting prostate cancer is greatly reduced.

    Stop giving our young people serious hangups it can waste valuable life time. Young people, get on with it and enjoy it without the badness as the Bishop said.

    Nicholas

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  19. Masturbating gets rid of dead semen in the penis, if you don't masturbate regularly, your chances of prostate cancer go up. So if we don't masturbate, we could die, and God doesn't kill people without reason, does he?

    Patrick, 19.

    Spirits have always faced violent opposition with mediocre minds.
    --Albert Einstein

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  20. I have noticed that everything that God doesn't want us to do has a reason, we may say that if we just drink a little that it won't effect us. God says that it will lead up to something worse. Same with things like stealing, you'll steal so much you'll eventually effect someone else. This isn't true with masturbation, you effect no one when you masturbate, when you lust after a woman,(or man) they won't know, so you're effecting nobody. In fact, if masturbation was outlawed or forbidden, there would be probably be more rapings and melessed children. Remember the Catholic priests that melessed children? Priests that are Catholic are forbidden to all sexual acts at all, so after going so long without it, you become uncontrollable.

    Just my thoughts and I am NO expert.

    Josh

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  21. I'm not going to read all the replies before I answer. I haven't read anything in the Bible saying masturbation is a sin. The Bible talks about sexual immorality and lust and adultery, nothing about touching yourself in a sexual manner. I guess some will never get over the hangups concerning sexuality, as if it of itself is sinful. We are all sinners no matter what, that is why we have Jesus Christ. If what you are doing causes you to be immoral and your conscience( or the Spirit) tells you that you are being wicked, then cease and desist. But I think its better to masturbate than to burn with lust and go out and do something stupid, like having one-night stands or paying for hookers. Now THAT is sexual immorality.

    If you can do it in a responsible and healthy and private manner, I don't see the wrong in it. Unless your wacking off to photos of kids or fantasizing about your brother's wife, etc etc. I think we all know when we are being ungodly.

    May you have Peace and blessings from God the Father and our Lord Jesus Christ.

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  22. There is the islamic point of view on this issue.

    Although islamic sharia (law) is quiet on this issue, masturbation is permitted only on these circumstances.

    -If you think you might commit adultery or fornification by watching porn or calling some girl over etc.

    -When masturbating strictly do not think of sexual thoughts, this is just to relieve you. if you think of bad thoughts then the whole point is beaten, you've commit the sin.

    So basically its to prevent you from doing the sin of adultery and fornification.

    Allah is the One.

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    1. Allah is the One, God is one, Jesus is God(by way of Trinity)Peace be upon Gods Prophets. Good to see our Islamic friends on here.Sean

      Ps to think of or about bad thoughts is to put them under scrutiny so exercising wise judgement is a complex issue. Sean

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  23. There is nothing at all wrong with masturbation. It is natural. It is safe. Is is a sin to have a nocturnal emmision? Are having dreams about sex a sin? Well, of course not, as you do not have control over your dreams. Christians believe anything that feels good is a sin. It is ok to masturbate. Furthermore, I believe Jesus masturbated. All guys masturbate. If they say they don't they are probably lying which is another sin. Masturbation does not hurt anyone else, and if done in the privacy of your own home is a great way to relieve tension and to stay healthy. It is a fact that men who masturbate lower their risk of prostate cancer. They also live longer. There is nothing in the Bible that directly says masturbation is a sin. Christians just like taking pieces of the Bible to make masturbation a perverted activity, which is certainly is not. ALL little boys masturbate. Are they going to hell? Give me a break. Live your life on Earth to the fullest. Enjoy the body that God gave you. Touch it. Don't be afraid. You will not be sent to the fires of Hell. What if there is no Heaven? Wouldn't you want to live this life on Earth to the fullest. Even if there is a Heaven. Don't you think God wants you to have the best life possible. Self gratification was made possible by our creator. I believe HE wants us to enjoy ourselves in every way, as long as we are not hurting ourselves or anyone else in the process.

    Proud to be Catholic and fully Sexual.

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  24. Heres something I want everyones views on. I am a penticostal preacher in SC. I have a wife. After she had our baby she was less sexually active. So now, things just aren't the way they use to be...sexually. I do everything I know how to do to live right so I have steered away from this thing and finally: well you married guys know, you have to just work it out of your wife sometimes. LOL (cannot believe I'm typing this) So here is a thought. What if you masturbated, but you think of your wife the entire time. My wife is very attractive to me, and my eyes toward no other compared to her. I have this question asked to me all the time, but I don't really have a strong point on what is and what isn't. I stay away from this act all together for its better to be safe than sorry, but what does everyone think on this? Thought I would throw this in for even more confusion.

    Preacher who needs enlightened as well.

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    1. Masturbation does not come under the nuclear material level of health & safety so no need for the excessive protacols. My body tells me I'm tired when my eyes get heavy. My body also tells me I need sexual activity by..well you know this one. Sometimes it is possible & sometimes it is not At times like this I think of my cousins hot water boiler. It is run by solid fuel & when the water gets extra hot you can hear it rumble. My cousin afraid of a burst turns the hot tap on to release the pressure. Sometimes we as men & women need to turn the tap on too if you follow my analogy. This fall under the realm of nature not morality. There are folk who masturbate to excess & in this is a whole different ballgame. What I say refers to the average man & woman in the street. Peace & Prayers Sean

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    2. according to the old men that run the chuch and wack off more than any of us, it is a sin. You are not allowed to think of your wife and masturbate, even if you are in Iraq and your wife sends you a suggestive photo, it's a sin. You know, all those head catholic guys that made up the mortal sin, venial sin, the scoring system to determine if you go to hell or not. Gee, I woulda thunk that God is smart enough to determine if you should be with Him or not, and not need help from the head hochos in Rome. God gave us the 10 commandments, but the chuch expanded it to 1,000 commandments like God forgot some and needed help in His old age to lay them all out there.

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  25. I agree that the act of masterbation is not a sin. Jesus never spoke of it, and you won't find any justification and disapproval of it in the Bible. There are not too many men that can actually say they have never done it. I also feel that masterbating could cause a man to have the need to find a woman, leading to a lustful nature.

    If you feel guilty about it, then maybe you are using methods that are actually sinful.

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  26. If you want to take your chance and regret it for all of eternity, then be my guest!

    God Bless!

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  27. So as long as you're not thinking of someone while masturbating there would not necessarily be any sin. Just the physical act is not what is sinful but the thoughts that are commonly associated with it that are.

    Pat

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  28. This is a very difficult issue. And for someone trapped in the chains of sexual sin, there is no easy answer - but there is the stunning grace of God for freedom.

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  29. For completeness, here's the Catechism of the Catholic church's take on masturbation:

    By masturbation is to be understood the deliberate stimulation of the genital organs in order to derive sexual pleasure. "Both the Magisterium of the Church, in the course of a constant tradition, and the moral sense of the faithful have been in no doubt and have firmly maintained that masturbation is an intrinsically and gravely disordered action."137

    "The deliberate use of the sexual faculty, for whatever reason, outside of marriage is essentially contrary to its purpose." For here sexual pleasure is sought outside of "the sexual relationship which is demanded by the moral order and in which the total meaning of mutual self-giving and human procreation in the context of true love is achieved."138 To form an equitable judgement about the subjects' moral responsibility and to guide pastoral action, one must take into account the affective immaturity, force of acquired habit, conditions of anxiety, or other psychological or social factors that lessen or even extenuate moral culpability.

    Not sure about it!!

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    1. I am a lifelong practicing Catholic. I am 80 and since 25 years I live alone. I masturbate regularly, once or twice a week, since a number of years. I know perfectly well what is Church’s stand on such situation and I totally disagree. Church’s position, as on other matters, is devoid of charity, compassion and understanding, and is disconnected from the real life.
      Masturbation is a very personal act, which does not cause any harm neither to me, nor to anybody else. So how could it possibly be regarded as a grevious matter, as a mortal sin? If I was to be condemned for it, I would find myself together with those Gestapo and NKWD men, each one of whom has personally murdered hundreds or thousands of people. There is no logic or justice in such reasoning.
      I go to Confessions during the Holly Week and then refrain from masturbation for about a month. A couple of times during confessions priests told me, that masturbation is not a sin and that I could receive Communion all the same. At first I felt a tremendous relief, but then knowing official stand of the Church I could not act on such advice. But it just shows, that even some priests contest Church’s teachings in this respect.
      There another related question. What about men who are not Catholics? Like other Cristian denominations or other faiths all together, where masturbation is not considered a sin or even an immoral act. Will they be condemned all the same? Or is it only us, who are not allowed to masturbate? I have put this question to several priests, but never received a satisfactory answer. One even told me, that the Anglicans most likely will not be saved anyway.
      In order to believe I do need a logical base.
      So, is masturbation a sin? Absolutely not.
      These are my thoughts on this subject.

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  30. When it comes to masturbation, there are two types of guys: those who do it, and those who lie about it.

    Owen

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  31. "It is my opinion that masturbation is not much of an issue with God. It is a normal part of adolescence which involves no one else. It does not cause disease. It does not produce babies, and Jesus did not mention it in the Bible. I'm not telling you to masturbate, and I hope you won't feel the need for it. But if you do, it is my opinion that you should not struggle with guilt over it. Why do I tell you this? Because I deal with so many Christian young people who are torn apart with guilt over masturbation; they want to stop and just can't. I would like to help you avoid that agony." -- Dr. James Dobson, "Preparing for Adolescence - Straight talk to teens and parents," Regal (1979).

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  32. This is a seemingly tireless question on the internet, and the answer is a resounding NO, as long as its private and doesn't adversely affect others. The act itself properly done is not only harmless, but beneficial to both sexes. Its well known that the Bible doesn't overtly talk about masturbation. Only a few groups hold to the "wasting the seed" theory promulgated by the rabbis and then the Catholic church. There is the reference to the ceremonial uncleanness caused by seminal emissions in Leviticus 15:16ff, regardless of whether one was alone or with his wife. But, this doesn't speak specifically to either masturbation or its morality. There is a somewhat obscure reference in Ezekiel 16 to a woman, symbolic of God's wife, using the gold and silver he gave her to make "images of male", dildos, with which to "fornicate" like a "loose woman". But, that doesn't say masturbation or dildoes are sinful. It teaches that idolatry is sinful. So, most people end up basing their belief about masturbation on a definition of "lust".

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  33. My Dear Bishop Pat, sez I (feeling like a 99 year old)I'm surprised you are using up electronic on this one. The auld *ank is as old as history. Ask any vet in Dublin zoo & they will tell you what the primates get up to. If thoughts sexual or otherwise were sins I'd never be able to pay my debt to God. An old priest called Joe Smyth used to jump up & down in the confessionbox when I confessed masturbation so I went accross the isle to Enda Farrell-"he never sed nawthin"(never said nothing). A scottish junior school teacher in Stechford, Birmingham once showed me a R E book for a 1st communion class which was long out of date. It had pictures of angels & devils. Look said Mrs Gough the devils in the picture are having more fun in the flames than the pofaced angels on the clouds. That lesson never left me. Look at the disengaged scientific contributions of some of the contributors on this topic. Its time to move masturbation & sex away from aristotelian metaphysics. A *ank is a *ank. Get a life people God has more important things to focus his energy on Ted(drink,fek,girls *ank)Sean

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  34. A very interesting and holy comment from the Archbishop of Cantebury today - he says that young people see anti-gay, anti-sex attitudes from Christians as wicked and hateful!

    A wonderful Christian leader.

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  35. I think Pat is physic as I was thinking after the prostitution post of asking him for his thoughts on masturbation. By the way I am too tired but enjoyed the discussion, too tired to comment now. But I hope Pat will not mind if I r3commend to you his books, so inspirational, honest, and with more insight than any old book written by a selected few who lived many decades after Jesus, rewritten, reinterpr3ted, too tired to go on. You can get them on ebay and amazon and will not be disappointed. Sleep calls, the great redeemer, tomorrow will follow, then soon the weekend...

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  36. Pat, you are an evil scumbag. No doubt you fantasise about wee lads having a wank. Most of the garbage on your blog is written from yourself to yourself; or by equally crazed nutcases. You talk about 'cults'? You have created the cult of Buckleyism. No priest should trust you - you, some years ago, outted a number of priests to Paddy Walsh (another old queen).You are a vicious and poisonous bastard. Remember when you were blocked out of your mind in the Europa Hotel and attacked the Scottish couple? It was in the papers. Piss off, you self righteous buffoon. You will roast in hell. Paul (former student in the 'Wing' - St Malachy's College - in the 90's)














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    1. Paul,

      From your comment I can see your time in the seminary did you a lot of good.

      I will allow the blog readers to make up their mind about your contribution.

      Bishop Pat

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    2. Pat, Infamy voiced in a certain way can be a compliment. I guess the contributor above has so much froth in his pint glass there is very little room for propper brew. I do not know about the alleged Europa incident & can not comment. I know I celebrated mass once pissed as a fart. I married twins with my head in an alcoholic haze. I am not proud of these incidents but all I can say is that anyone who has been in the wars is bound to get a scar or two. This is not an excuse it is human nature & I take responsability for both good & bad things I have done in the past. Human nature is a paradox which can only be resolved through the mystery of the cross. Sean

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    3. Sean,

      Just a clarification. Some years ago - before the smoking ban - I was in the SMOKING area of the Europa Hotel's first floor lounge and my friend was smoking a small cigar.

      An elderly man approached us and said that he and his wife could smell my friend's cigar. I told him we in the smoking area. He said he didn't care and ordered my friend to quit smoking.

      My friend refused - as he was in the smoking area. The man got abusive and I simply said to him:

      "If you bring your parents down to Larne tomorrow I will marry them" :-)

      He went out and rang a newspaper and accused me of insulting him.

      It was late afternoon and I was having a cup of tea.

      Pat

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    4. I was in the Wing in the 90's and if you are the same Paul then you were a great friend of McManus!! You were in and out of his rooms a lot Paul.

      Why are you so angry???

      Enda

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    5. Paul,

      Why don't you join us in the Oratory Society and experience positive christian living. We are not ashamed of our humanity, we have made mistakes and will make mistakes - it is how we deal with them!

      No do you really want to get into a debate about dealing with mistakes??

      Friend of the Oratory Society

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    6. Paul I recall visiting the Wing in the 90's on a vocation evening, i was 13, 14 then 15 - I gave up after that. However, I recall the 'sems' discussing this very topic with us 'prospects' in detail!!

      Glass houses my friend, glass houses! My lasting impression is that you were all up to it, lived in denial and ran to confession. As a grown up Catholic I will teach my kids the normality of feelings in order NOT to screw them up as most of the 'sems' were God love them!

      I for one like to open minded and open ended questions and answers on this blog. However, the only insults seem to come from conservative nuts like yourself.

      Thank you Pat for your diversity!

      Practicing but eyes wide open Catholic.

      P.S. My PP is the most lonely guy going - it is cruel at every level. I hope he at least is able to have a little relief without beating himself up about it. When will the conservatives build a bridge about 'sex' and 'sexuality' and cross the ..cking thing and give us all a break!!

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  37. Best way I have seen to call someone aastard, pat, made melaugh.

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  38. Hi I've been dealing with the same thing. I dont want to offend God by masturbating but I not too recently visited my local doctor and she told me that I had to masturbate because it was good for me. The reason she told me that was because I went in complaint of some problems down there and she said the best thing to do was to masturbate. I don't want to offend God or make myself impure but typically the problems do go away after I masturbate. That day I was also prescribed antibiotics just in case I had an infection but I just dont want to go to hell but also do not want have to deal with those problems.
    I know people say that lust is the main problem with masturbating but typically I don't think or fantasize about women while doing so. Also I've never had sex. I'm in my early 20s and hope to be married before 30 but until then my only other option is masturbating to help with the problems. And I'm very concerned my outlook in life is one of I could die of any moment and I want to be worthy of being with God so I'm not too sure what to do.

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    1. There must be a reason god wants you to masturbate. Like everyone else on earth: I cannot be certain I am right. For your own "safety" I would simply pray on the subject and just do it. It's not like god wants you to have those problems.

      Once again, I'm no expert. Just trying to help.

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  39. There is an issue here that I think really needs to be addressed, and it concerns Matthew 5:28 - looking at a woman lustfully. As a B(th) Theology graduate, and lifelong student of this subject, I can tell you all that this passage DOES NOT mean what you think it does. I am no longer a believer, but from a biblical, historical point of view, Matt: 5:28 is a reiteration of Exodus 20:17 - the 10th Commandment (you shall not covet your neighbours property; neither his house, his oxen, ass, slave, maidservant, WIFE or any other chattel.) The word rendered 'lustfully' in Matt: 5:28 is taken from the Koine Greek 'epithumia' meaning 'desire to possess.' You will notice the word used is adultery and not fornication, so a pre-existing marriage had to be a factor.
    During the time of Jesus, a man's wife was his lawfully-owned property, in-keeping with a culture that was accepting of slavery - owning another human being as chattel. A woman was sold into marriage by her father for 50 shekels, and her virginity was the primary commodity of commercial value. If a virgin was raped, she had no choice but to marry her own rapist - for life! (Deut. 22:28-29.) Romance did not exist until the Troubadours invented it in the 12th Century. Biblical marriage relationships bore no resemblance to how we view them today.
    As unsettling as this may be to many Christians, Matthew 5:28 is not referring to 21st Century teenagers masturbating to pornography. It is a command that a man must not covet his neighbour's chattel - his wife. Clearly, (and fortunately) this doctrine is not applicable to our more civilized Western culture. Without feelings of sexual passion, none of us would even exist.

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    1. Tanya, I could not disagree with you more. When Christ said that a man could not look at another woman and lust after her in his heart, he was actually showing how extreme God's holiness is compared to man's standards. He even says a few lines later in the same sermon that if your right hand offends you, cut it off. This was hyperbole, but the point he was making is that we are all sinners and we need to be humble and come to God for forgiveness and not be self-righteous.

      Also, to say that biblical marriages bore no resemblance to modern marriages (what you mean to say is western, secular marriages) is a very snobbish attitude. It is basically mocking all those marriages that you know nothing about. Those people may have been perfectly happy, and from what I can tell today, many people are not. Especially children of all the broken families in your "civilized world." Those people had a way of doing things and we have our way. You think you're way is better, you're a snob. At least their marriages lasted, the children were raised with a mother and a father, and it wasn't all about the selfishness of each parent deciding their careers or extra marital affairs are more important than the family. You must be joking when you say that we are a more civilized society. That's simply hilarious. We are a selfish, lustful, pleasure-driven matriarchal society that is confused over gender and gender roles and who don't know how to raise respectful children. This society has just as many problems as all the past societies, the only difference is that we are foolish enough to think we don't. As long as people like you think the way you do, our society will not be able to fix its flaws, because we will think we don't have any. We are destroying human civilization and if you don't see it, you are blinded.

      And one more thing, as a young boy and then young man pornography ruined my life, and I am still dealing with the scars, and my poor wife has to suffer because of it. I would rather have lived in a world of wisdom where people fought against their animal impulses rather than surrendering to them.

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    2. Issac Chavez,

      I just came across your response from some time ago, and I really do feel compelled to point certain things out to you. You seem to have a penchant for not paying attention in class!

      You said: "When Christ said that a man could not look at another woman and lust after her in his heart, he was actually showing how extreme God's holiness is compared to man's standards."

      Since those words do not appear in the original text, I must congratulate you on having the favor of the divine, to the extent that he would bestow knowledge upon you that he denies all others. You must have an extremely high opinion of yourself.

      Yes, I was referring to modern marriages, not only secular, but also Christian marriages. I made this clear in my closing paragraph. PAY ATTENTION! I really don't think that 'snobbish' is an appropriate term for someone who recognizes the distinction between the behaviors of a primitive time period, and the way we live today. Or perhaps you would like to see us return to practicing slavery and a man owning a woman as property? You see, I am very much into freedom, regardless of perils and pitfalls that may or may not come with it. If you have an objection to this, perhaps you should relocate to somewhere like North Korea. After all, defending tyranny with one hand but enjoying the privileges and freedoms laid down by a democracy with the other - is at the height of hypocrisy. Nothing pissed Jesus off more, as I recall.

      You say that it is mock-worthy when I say that we live in a more civilized society today. I'll admit, it isn't perfect. It's a work in progress. However, I do think you'd have to go a long way to find slavery in action, copious incidents of genocide, infanticide, smashing babies against rocks, the rape of innocent virgin girls as the spoils of war, the rape of innocent women as a punishment to their disobedient husbands, forcing rape victims to marry their own rapists, human sacrifice, punishing innocents for the crimes of the guilty, cruelty to animals, and the eternal torture of any who dare to disagree. It's all there - all divinely endorsed in the Bible - which is why I could never be a Christian. Do you really think that the ills of the West come even close to the evils the Bible calls for?

      You will defend all of this, but you'll have a problem with trifling, trivial activities such as masturbation and pornography? And after the religion itself is the entity that gave you a problem with them in the first place? Nobody wants anything more than that which they cannot have. It creates obsessions. In the case of masturbation, there are natural, hormonal hungers associated with it that you are not meant to 'conquer'. You are running toward those who oppressed you in the first place and defending them. My husband almost took his own life as a teenager over this evil 'hellfire for masturbators' sadism. If you want to go head to head with me over this, bring it on!

      Tanya

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  40. How sad when a priest uses "science and psychology" to make a moral argument, instead of Scriptures, tradition, and the Church's teaching. Glad you're not my priest. If I wanted to know what the secular modern's believed I would go to Wikipedia. I want to know the wisdom of the Church.

    And it isn't difficult to see why masterbation would be a sin. I DON'T CARE IF EVERYBODY DOES IT. Since when did everyone doing it make it okay? Everyone lies at sometime too, and covets, and dishonors their parents. Are you going to tell us how these things are acceptable?

    It's simple: when someone masterbates, they are lusting in their heart. Now it sounds to me like you haven't read the Bible for some time so let me remind you what Jesus said: "If a man looks at another woman and LUSTS AFTER HER IN HIS HEART, he has committed adultery." I got news for you, "father", most people who masterbate aren't thinking about a white wall. The wisdom of the church is to fight the temptation of lust not to just give in.

    I would take your old stern Irish priests that you mock any day over you. I want the religion of Christ and his Church, not some modern materialist, progressive. And yes, I'm angry. I'll go confess that to the priest. Hopefully he doesn't tell me its okay.

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    1. Isaac,
      you are really self righteous. I can tell you are perfect, cause you love throwing the first stone, over and over and overf.

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    2. Jackson, what do you base your answer on.
      Can you provide sources.
      Oh, hang on, its just a personal attack since you seem to have nothing intelligent to say

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  41. In my mind the focus of the question of mr. Buckley is all wrong. Not just on this specific topic, but on all occasions in life, we should realise God has not created us with the purpose not to sin, but to love us. The only possible response to this complete act of bestowment of God to us, is to dedicate our life for His Glory.

    The question should then not be, what are we to do in order not to sin; but what can we do to bring about God's Glory? How can we use our lives to receive God's love and love Him unconditionally.

    The reason I say this, because when discussing masturbation, it falls short to try and look for bible verses that proclaim it be a sin; and when not finding any, concluding it then must be ok. The question is, can we in light of Jesus (and this includes ofcourse the Holy Bible) learn how to use God's gift of sexuality for the glory of God.

    When the bible speaks about sex, it always refers to marriage and the union of man and wife. It is in this way sexuality can be used for Gods glory as a physical act of giving yourself to your spouse, to become one in flesh, in complete bestowment towards each other, open for the gift of life from God. And it is in this union, this ultimate form of love, that God has chosen new life should be created.

    Masturbation is quite the opposite. It is a response to a self centered, egocentric desire of the flesh. This is NOT the sexual desire that God has given us (i.e. the desire to completely give yourself to your spouse) but a perversion of this. Much in the same way God intented man to live forever, but sin has made us mortal, also sin has given us this perverted sexual desire. So it is in a natural sense 'normal' to have this as it is 'normal' to die. But this does not mean God has intended us to use it because we have the urge to masturbate.

    Mr. Buckley claims science has shown the benefits of masturbation (and he is right w.r.t. for instance prostate cancer, though this is a miniscule difference), but leaves out all the negative effects. Not that these negative effects make it bad in the eyes of our Lord, but I do think it is an unfair representation of the physiology and psychology of masturbation.

    I want to finish by saying something to all men. Often you hear that 'everybody does it' and all the people that say not to do it just lie. I am 25 years old, healthy and fit, and I do not masturbate. I have in the past, but for a long time now not anymore. By the grace of our Lord, as everything, it can be done.

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  42. Thank you Bishop, you are a brave man and tell the truth. It's hard for me to say it is a sin, it's just too strong a desire. Those who say it is a sin are always self righteous and really display that holier than though attitude. All those people that are adamant it is a sin think those that perform the act are the worst people since Judas Iscariot. These people also do not believe Our Lord said, he who is without sin, let him cast the first stone.

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  43. totally confusing,why can't the church give a correct straight forward answer to this question which many real God fearing catholics wish to ask?

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  44. Ok, I have just worried myself to no end about it, I've read some comments, and being not Catholic, I've started going to a catholic church because I do talk with GOD several times a day, everyday, and have ask him to forgive me for the past things I've done in life, and I know he knows deep in my heart that I want to be very close to him, and for him to get rid of sinful thoughts, actions, etc. I go on with my life feeling better about myself, then, all of a sudden, my mind wants to think of sexual things, I fight it as hard as I can, and then I kind of get mad at myself, and say, just get it over with, masturbate. My mind wants to think of someone, and I fight the thoughts as Im in the act of masturbating. I feel bad, guilty, mad at myself. Give myself a little while of, I guess, you'd call it empty thoughts, then ask him "why cant I control it, I dont want to do this anymore" I start thinking, yes, Jesus/God does forgive sins, and he knows I've already gave in to what I didnt want to do in the first place, then, "stress myself out, thinking I just gave in to it, now what" later on, I try to figure things out, when I go to bed, and say my prayers I ask again for forgiveness, and say I repent of my sins, it may be weeks, or months before it happens again, masturbate, and it continues as I said with feeling guilty,etc. I really need an answer to feel better about myself and/or control these urges to not do it again. What is it I should think, do or feel when I break?

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  45. All I can say is that EVERYONE on this blog except Tanya has proven themselves to be a complete w@nker whether they masturbate or not. I count myself too for bothering to post but then again I know that the idea of an interventionist "God" is ridiculous so I don't give a sh1t either way. Best of luck when you get to the "pearly gates" x

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  46. I'm a 30y old woman and I'm single. I know very well what it's like to be young and fit and isolated. I have autism and I'm not capable of bonding and intimacy.
    I think that what Jesus labeled as "lustful", we call in our days "abusive". It is sin to abuse someone and it is sin to have abusive fantasies. When we masturbate we don't want to abuse anyone, we're lonely or we are attracted to someone and we fantasise about making love with that person. Our bodies produce hormones that trigger sexual arousal. Repressing that is not the way.
    Jesus encouraged us to strive for perfection and serve God ACCORDING TO EACH INDIVIDUALS CAPACITY. If we put pressure on young people to do something that is not in their capacity, it's not surprising they resent the church and even God.
    My body signals to men that I am fertile and because I don't have a husband, it triggers hormones in their body. I met plenty of catholic priests who look at me with ache - and that's not lustful - that's an ache for something beautiful you can't have.
    I don't mind if single men masturbate and they think of me - as long as they don't want to hurt me, I don't mind. Even if it is a priest - at least he'll have a better sleep after that.

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  47. I'm a 19 year old man. And admittedly I masturbate. I don't know if masturbation is really a sin but the thing that I'm doing is whenever I do it, I confess. Because according to catholic teaching it is a sin.

    But surprisingly when I confessed it to the priest, he didn't said to me to stop masturbating, He never ever commented about it. He just said to me that I have to give up pornography. PERIOD.

    I think masturbation is normal in our view in a person's view. All men masturbate, and if they don't... It surely won't feel good. Then I masturbate everyday, but now I've lessen it. I only masturbate once a month.

    But let's all just assume it is a sin. Let's just try to confess it whenever we do it. Priests would surely understand us, because they know by themselves that they've done it before. :)

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    1. I am a lifelong practicing Catholic. I am 80 and since 25 years I live alone. I masturbate regularly, once or twice a week, since a number of years. I know perfectly well what is Church’s stand on such situation and I totally disagree. Church’s position, as on other matters, is devoid of charity, compassion and understanding, and is disconnected from the real life.
      Masturbation is a very personal act, which does not cause any harm neither to me, nor to anybody else. So how could it possibly be regarded as a grevious matter, as a mortal sin? If I was to be condemned for it, I would find myself together with those Gestapo and NKWD men, each one of whom has personally murdered hundreds or thousands of people. There is no logic or justice in such reasoning.
      I go to Confessions during the Holly Week and then refrain from masturbation for about a month. A couple of times during confessions priests told me, that masturbation is not a sin and that I could receive Communion all the same. At first I felt a tremendous relief, but then knowing official stand of the Church I could not act on such advice. But it just shows, that even some priests contest Church’s teachings in this respect.
      There another related question. What about men who are not Catholics? Like other Cristian denominations or other faiths all together, where masturbation is not considered a sin or even an immoral act. Will they be condemned all the same? Or is it only us, who are not allowed to masturbate? I have put this question to several priests, but never received a satisfactory answer. One even told me, that the Anglicans most likely will not be saved anyway.
      In order to believe I do need a logical base.
      So, is masturbation a sin? Absolutely not.
      These are my thoughts on this subject.

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  48. Didn't you even wonder why the priest yd you to quit porn? Because it is PRECIPTOUS to masturbation! If you watch the porn, you are going to bring yourself to orgasm! Get rid of the temptation, get rid of the fall!

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  49. Not sure who is right, who is wrong. No one touched on the subject of aged widowers so I guess they will all go to hell, since I am sure they have masturbated in their loneliness and frustration. Does anybody understand?

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  50. i met a special guy who cared for me so much, who just knows me inside out. I have always known him as an academic. We fell in love. He told me he is in fact a priest, therefore we can not. But we fell in love regardless. He commits to the priestly lifestyle at a tender age of 17, now he is in his early 40s, never truly loved anyone body and soul. He told me he has not masturbated for 20 years. He has no sexual desire, but making me happy physically brings him happiness and satisfaction. I actually feel sorry for him. The so called religious order. Emotionally and physically we connects tremendously, but he has huge sense of guilt and can not be true to himself or me or his religion and just want to pretend to everyone that nothing happens. This i think is sadder than no masturbation, of feeling love but not able to love body and soul. and everybody loves.

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  51. The first time I masturbated, I was 10 years old, my elder brother told me how to do it. I could not believe the beautiful sensations that flew through my body, they were so good that I fainted !! I have been doing it all my life and I find it a wonderful feeling and love it. I even tried to suck my penis once but couldn't reach it. Anyway I am 62 years old now and was wondering if I would be eligible to go to heaven.

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  52. Hi all, first time reader. I have masturbated since I was 14 and I haven't stopped since. I am 34 years old now and I have been married for 2 years now and my wife doesn't know but suspects it. I cannot tell her as i am ashamed and afraid. I try to stop but it is hard. I pray to God to help me but i get back into the urges and go right back to it. Recently i found out my father has stage 4 cancer and im afraid that God has punished me by giving my dad cancer. i feel like alot of bad things has happened to me. Please help do you think god is angry with me?

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    1. God would never punish you in any way. He is a loving God that only wants the best for you & everyone. He loves you unconditionally regardless of what you do or have done.

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