THE 2013 CATHOLIC PRIEST
THERE IS A 90% CHANCE HE IS SECRETLY GAY AND A 10% CHANCE HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND AND / OR A CHILD.
HE CAN BE FOUND ON GAY DATING SITES ON THE INTERNET AND OCCASIONALLY IN GAY SAUNAS IN DUBLIN.
HE GOES ON HOLIDAYS, USUALLY WITH OTHER GAY PRIESTS, TO SPAIN OR SAN FRANCISCO WHERE HE FEELS FREE TO BE GAY 24/7.
HE DOES NOT BELIEVE IN GOD OR IN ANYTHING ELSE FOR THAT MATTER AND YOU WILL NEVER CATCH HIM PRAYING.
HIS OWN LIFE IN A COMPLETE CONTRADICTION BUT HE PREACHES AT SUNDAY MASS AGAINST DIVORCE, CONTRACEPTION, HOMOSEXUAITY, GAY MARRIAGE, SEX OUTSIDE MARRIAGE.
HE FORCES BRIDES AND GROOMS TO ATTEND PRE-MARRIAGE COURSES AND AT THOSE COURSES HE LECTURES THEM ABOUT MORALITY.
HE HELPS HIMSELF TO PARISH FUNDS TO SUPPLEMENT HIS £20,000 A YEAR SALARY BECAUSE HE THINKS HE'S WORTH FAR MORE.
THE ONLY REASON HE LIKES BRING HOLY COMMUNION TO OLD LADIES AT HOME OR IN NURSING HOMES IS BECAUSE THEY ALL HAVE A £20 NOTE ON THE TABLE BESIDE THEIR BED TO GIVE HIM.
HE IS IN HIS PARISH ON SATURDAY EVENING AND SUNDAY MORNING BUT THE REST OF THE TIME HE IS VISITING OTHER PRIESTS OR FRIENDS AND WINEING AND DINING WITH THEM ALL WEEK.
HE SECRETLY HATES HIS BISHOP BUT STILL KISSES HIS RING AND CALLS HIM "MY LORD" IN ORDER TO KEEP IN WITH HIM AND GET GOOD PARISH APPOINTMENTS.
HE VISITS HIS MAMMY A FEW TIMES A WEEK WHO IS SO PROUD TO HAVE A SON IN THE PRIESTHOOD.
HE LOVES VISITING CONVENTS WHERE THE OLD NUNS ADORE HIM AND TREAT HIM LIKE A GOD.
WHEN HE BECOMES A PARISH PRIEST HE BECOMES A DICTATOR AND TREATS THE LAITY LIKE SHIT.
WHEN HE IS "OFF DUTY", WHICH IS MOST OF THE TIME, HE WEARS DESIGNED SHIRTS, JEANS AND SHOES. WHEN HE IS ON DUTY HE WEARS EXPESIVE ALBS AND VESTMENTS BOUGHT IN THE MOST EXPENSIVE ROMAN ESTABLISHMENTS.
THE ONLY HOUSES HIS VISITS IN THE PARISH ARE THE HOUSES OF THE WEALTHY OR THOSE HOUSES WHERE THERE IS A VERY GOODLOOKING TEENAGE YOUNG MAN.
HE LEAVES RUDE AND ABUSIVE ANONYMOUS MESSAGES ON BLOGS LIKE MINE.
IS IT ANY WONDER THAT THE CATHOLIC CHURCH IS AS F****D UP AS IT IS?
Bishop Pat Buckley
6.11.2013
Perhaps a bit exaggerated for effect but in principal I can agree with what you say. To a small extent I was that soldier-sorry-priest. Mind you I always treated my parishioners with dignity and respect-Sean
ReplyDeletePS The reason -priests don't pray is because the frustrations of being the clerical club has blinded them to the beauty of a relationship with God, Man and Woman. To some extent priests are victims of their own formation Sean
ReplyDelete