Wednesday, 25 May 2016

DOWN AND CONNOR - REAL CHANGES NEEDED

DOWN AND CONNOR - REAL CHANGES NEEDED

Noel Treanor
In a very surprising move the Bishop of Down and Connor, Noel Treanor, who is tied up in Church European affairs, has asked me to make this year's diocesan changes. 

The following are those changes to take effect on Friday June 3rd 2016.

1. The Diocesan Seminary on Cliftonville Road to be closed as of June 1st and the students there to be sent to St Patrick's College, Maynooth. The seminary is to be sold and the proceeds to be used for diocesan pastoral work.

2. Father Oliver Treanor to be PP Rasharkin.

3. Father Eugene O'Hagan to be PP St Teresa's Belfast.

4. Mrs Gloria Duggan DCL to be Diocesan Chancellor.

5. Father Joe Glover to be PP Coleraine.

6. Miss Tanya Byrne to be Diocesan Secretary.

7. Father Brendan Mulhall to return to his religious order.

8. Father Paul Flemming to be PP Dromaroad.

9. Father Peter Donnelly PP Dromaroad to retire. 

10. Father John Murray PP Rasharkin to be chaplain, The Poor Clare's, Tenerife.

11. Father Niall Coll to be PP Our Lady Queen of Peace.

12. Sr. Angela Casey DD to replace Father Niall Coll in St Mary's Training College. 

13. Father Gerard Fox to be PP Randalstown.

14. Father Colin Grant to be CC St Peter's Cathedral.

15. Father Timothy Bartlett to be CC St Paul's Belfast.

16. Father Eddie McGee to be PP Drumbo. 

17. Father Joseph Rooney to be PP Lisburn.

18. Mr Jarlath Devine DCL to take on Father Rooney's canon law duties. 

19. Father Michael Spence to be chaplain City Hospital.

20. Father Andrew Black to be CC Ballymurphy.

21. Father Brian Waters to be CC Newcastle. 

22. Father Hugh Kennedy to be chaplain Maghaberry Prison.

23. Mrs Mary Doran to be Diocesan Press Officer. 

24. Father Con Boyle to be PP St Oliver Plunkett Belfast.

25. Father Darren Brennan to be Adm Ballyclare.

26. Father Ciaran Dallat, Father Aidan Brankin, Father Rory Sheehan, Father Martin Kelly and Father Dermot Mc Caughan to retire on health grounds.

27. Mrs Carole Hamilton BA, BL to be the new Diocesan Complaints Officer to initially handle all complaints about parishes, clergy and finances. 

28. Dr Ciaran O'Grady MD, FRCP to be Diocesan Safeguarding Officer. 

29. Dom Edward Gibbons OSB to be Spiritual Director to the bishop and clergy to organise monthly Days of Prayer and the Diocesan Priest's Retreat.

30. Dr John Harkin  D.Coun. to set up a confidential priest's counselling service to be funded by The Priest Provident Fund. This service will not interact with any church official. 

31. Brother Stephen OFM  D.Liturgy to be diocesan and episcopal Master of Ceremonies. 

32. Harvey Jones Accountants to be controller of all diocesan and parochial funds and to issue a full diocesan and parochial public statement of accounts annually. 

33. Mr Jack Drummond, formerly Unison, to be employment rights and conditions advocate for diocesan priests and other employees.

45 comments:

  1. IF ONLY Bishop Treanor had the imagination, vision and courage to make changes like these!!! A couple of problems though, Pat:

    1. It would be a long drive from Rasharkin to the City Hospital for Michael Spence, so maybe Oliver Treanor could go to Rasharkin?

    2. Martin O'Callaghan is too ill to serve anywhere anymore and Brian Watters also has debilitating health problems.

    3. It's Brendan MULHALL (not Mulholland) for the sakes of both Coleraine parish and the Redemptorist Order, as I'm sure Coleraine will want to pay tribute to Fr Mulhall's awe-inspiring dedication to pastoral ministry - and the Reds will be thrilled to welcome back such a gem into their ranks.

    Wonderful changes for the most past though.

    Now what was that loud thud heard around the Somerton Rd just now? Oh no. It's Timo. He's fainted!

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    Replies
    1. I have taken your corrections on board and made changes accordingly.

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    2. You say Brian Waters is too ill to be CC Newcastle.

      But he says a lot of Masses just now in Lisburn?

      A Lisburn parishioner tells me he gets paid £100 per Mass by Dermot McCaughan who is absent a lot on account of his "health" problems?

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    3. You are right Pat. He does say Masses in lisburn. He does seem to be in physical difficulty at times though.

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    4. Well we must have compassion for him of course.

      But £100 a Mass would leave any priest comfortly off.

      If it happened everyday it would be £ 36,500 pa.

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    5. Only if he said Mass there everyday - which he doesn't. More like once a week. McCaughan is a generous tipper all the same.

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    6. An Indian priest who also supplies there sometimes says that Dermot is not as generous to him ?

      Maybe the Rupee exchange rate is not good just now?

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    7. I find it truly amazing that when Pat claims to be a bishop to all without borders, with so much work to do he manages to find the time to create blog posts like this. Clearly this is not something that was knocked out in 2 minutes. Once he posts it, he then seems to be constantly contributing to the comments section until late at night. It tells me that he isn't as busy as he would like everyone to believe. When I think of priests I know who haven't time to even have lunch some days with everything they have to do, I think its is incredible that Pat can spend all day commenting on his own blog. It tells me that the Roman Catholic Church has not suffered the loss of his departure. lol

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  2. A story is told about a certain Northern priest with highly advanced Wannabe Bishop Syndrome (WBS).

    A priest friend of his received a letter from the Nuncio asking for an assessment of the WBS sufferer's suitability for the episcopate.

    Said friend gave document to WBS priest to fill in for himself.

    Now to be fair to the poor man in the throes of WBS, he gave an honest "warts and all" account of his character.

    As well as giving a detailed appraisal of the numerous qualities beyond counting that qualify him for episcopal office, the victim of WBS also gave a candid admission of faults - among which were:

    falling asleep before finishing Compline twice during his priestly life thus far -

    inadvertently letting a Hallelujah slip out during Lent one time -

    forgetting, one day, that it was a Friday and polishing off a juicy big steak -

    having a weakness for Pringles, after all "one pop and you can't stop" -

    He asked for the above offences to be considered against the galaxy of his other stellar gifts and strengths.

    In fairness to him, it is God's Holy Will that he become a bishop and all he is doing, in filling out the document himself, is doing his best to ensure that God's Holy Will be done and forever glorified.

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    Replies
    1. Was that Ciaran Dallat? He was nearly a pop one time.

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    2. No Pat - not Ciaran. Ah now, Pat, it's staring you in the face. Sure you'll kick yourself when you find out... ;-)

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    3. Well it can't be Timo.Pringles do not go with champagne and I know for a fact that he promised Our Lady of Lourdes he would only eat lobster on a Friday. Further more he anticipates Compline every morning.

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    4. Now Pat, Timo did once make a very public confession a few years ago, in Clonard Monastery, about his weakness for Pringles. So I wouldn't rule him out ;-)

      He was preaching at the Novena. I'm sure it is on Youtube somewhere. The sermon, if I recall correctly, was about "will power".

      Timmy is very strong-willed and what he wants - he gets. Even if it means having to give up Pringles LOL

      He is so much misunderstood, poor Timo - he only quaffs Champers and scoffs lobster as a pure PENANCE in honour of St Fatty Arbuckle - his patron saint!

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    5. You would wonder with so much great stuff in the scriptures and so many important issues affecting the world and individuals, that given the chance to spread the Good News that Pat prefers to ignore all that to produce this blog post. Come on Pat. If you want to be a Pastor- be a pastor! Don't waste your time on (not particularly amusing) silliness.

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  3. Pat, I laughed at your changes. I though you might have appointed Fr Conleth Byrne as assistant to the bishop on matters of financial administration. This is a very prestigious post once held by Mgr Patrick J Mullally. Is there no post for Mr Nigel McClincock,the erstwhile friend of the former Cathedral Dean, the Very Rev Dr Hugh Kennedy,?

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    Replies
    1. Unfortunately Mr McClintock is tied into a 30 year contract at the cathedral and Father Byrne has been seconded to Dromore to raise funds to pay off the costs of Bishop McAreavey's recent world tour.

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    2. HILARIOUS! (NOT)

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  4. Thanks Pat your posting today and all the comments have definitely made me chuckle...well done!!!

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  5. Brian Waters would have some difficulty fitting in at Newcastle - the current PP Jim Crudden likes his space too much. Poor Tony Devlin could never cope with Tim boy - all that laughter and merriment would disappear from St Paul's as Timmy tried to outdo Tony at the Christmas Eve Mass. A better solution is to put Timmy in Ardglas and move Gerry McCloskey back to Belfast so that he is nearer the International Airport!

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    Replies
    1. Good idea. Are there direct flights from Belfast to "San Fran" at the moment?

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  6. Well, the Rasharkin congregation have been well and truly put in their place. And it would seem my nom-de-plume - "Rent-a-priest" - is very apt.

    Announcements in parish bulletin for past coupla weeks "Until further notice,

    urgent sick calls are to be directed to Fr Blayney in Dunloy, home number supplied, if you cannot contact him, you are to keep trying until you get him {seriously??!};

    Weekday funerals will be at noon. Fr McCullough (portstewart), mobile no. supplied, to officiate on Mon/Tues/Wed. Fr Brendan Mulhall, home no. given to officiate on Thurs/Fri/Sat. Sun funerals to take place at 11am Mass;

    Baptisms to take place after 11am Sun Mass once a month by arrangement with Fr A McNally, Dunloy {What if there is a funeral??} Forms to apply for baptism to be collected in sacristy, filled-in and returned to sacristy to be dealt with.;

    weddings - arrangements and paperwork to be administered by Fr Francis O'Brien Ballymoney, home no. given;

    general enquiries, phone Rasharkin parochial house and leave a message, or send an email."


    NOT ACCEPTABLE BISHOP TREANOR.


    For years, Rasharkin parish was totally in the black, financial-wise, and this is what they get in return. Sod all. Nothing. For years, Rasharkin parish contributed to the central fund to ensure "poorer" parishes were looked after and their priests got some amount to live on. Now Rasharkin has no parish priest and the parish is being left to its own devices. No indication that Fr Murray is coming back. No notion of appointing another permanent priest. Not a word from the bishop.

    Keep an eye firmly on the weekly collection figures. Good people of Rasharkin what do you think you are contributing towards in the current weekly collection? You have no pastoral care, nobody to speak to if you needed counselling, no daily Mass, etc. Will the bishop sit up and take notice when the weekly collection starts to dip??? People who have been used to a daily Mass will only accept a daily Communion service for a while. They will soon start to vote with their feet and go elsewhere for a daily Mass.

    Meanwhile, it would seem that it is Fr Murray's birthday soon. Some Parish members have been seen writing a 75th birthday card for him.


    R-a-P, Rasharkin

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    Replies
    1. One of the forgotten few in Rasharkin25 May 2016 at 23:42

      Ah what insight into the life of a Rasharkin Parishoner and while i agree with you on most of your comments I have to say in response to the no pastoral care etc section, we are well used to it even when Father Tenerife was in situ he is the last person to provide pastoral care or counselling. I would not be acceptable to the daily communion service as it is adminstered by lay ppl and I have been brought up to believe only a priest should touch the blessed eucharist and lets face facts some of these so called blessed hands lead lives outside of the church that leave a lot to be desired from a christian aspect.
      So Bishop Treanor whats the craic lets get a move on to restore Rasharkin parish to its former glory

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  7. Shite !!!!! . I thought this was genuine. As I was reading it I thought this is too good to be true

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    1. I had hoped - that as I previously suggested - that the Lord Bishop Buckley would refuse to allow any types of obscenities - such as 17.58 - on his site. I find it depressing, crude and unnecessary - my two budgies don't like it either.
      Sam

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    2. Sam, I think the above expression is mild. We are all adults.

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    3. Sam them budgies of yours are some pair if they can read pats blog . I reckon they are possessed by the devil and must be killed imediatley . I suggest you boil them in hot oil that's been blessed by hunch backed nun then eat them with wholemeal bread and tomato sauce . Then when you need to do a jobby take that said jobby and throw it at noel trainor . Then and only then will you be free from evil

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    4. Adults, Bishop, should behave in an adult fashion!
      My budgies - when they read you blog - stop singing when such stuff comes up.
      Strikes me that bad language can develop like drugs -
      Cannabis can lead to heroin!
      I have spent years teaching my budgies to read - would not harm them in any way?
      Sam!

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    5. A recent study showed that people who curse tend to be more honest and trustworthy and generally more decent people . I'm not sure who carried out the study but it was in several papers a while back

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    6. Furthermore, my budgies felt insulted when 20.23 suggested that they were possessed!
      When the Angelus bell rings they face the church in silent - I believe - adoration!
      Remember - St. Francis preached to the birds - I am sure they talked to him too!
      High and Low - the budgies dislike the term 'bird-brain' - they have high IQs - and are superior in many was to the human race!
      20.23 - do not jump to conclusions!!!'
      Sam

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  8. The poor Claires will become a lot poorer I wonder is there a bar in the convent ? . Father mulhall must return to clonard what will become of his weekly visitor ? . At least fr rory is happy enough he can concentrate on his widow twankie

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    Replies
    1. I think the Poor Clares in Tenerife make their own wine.

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    2. Is a Widow Twankie a species of spider?

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  9. MourneManMichael25 May 2016 at 20:12

    Diocesan clergy merry go round. Oh dear!
    Must be that fear inducing time of year when bishops crack their episcopal whip to let their minions know who is the Boss, especially those not toeing the episcopal party line. Who says 'power doesn't corrupt?'
    And if some changes seem incomprehensible? Well don't worry chaps, the Holy Spirit is at work, 'cos God 'moves in mysterious ways'.
    MMM

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  10. Why are you so obsessed with clericalism and the hierarchy and re-arranging priests Pat. Why don't you go do some ministry and forget this nonsense. I mean what is the point of this post? Have you ever considered posting anything about the Christian faith? In stead of obsessing on the church hierarchy of a church you don't even belong to?

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    1. Seriously what planet are you on?...what decade are you in????
      Pat moved before the church went belly up... has KEPT the same teachings...to a point, UNDERSTANDS humans, and as we all realise now the RC Church is a load of pants and does not give a toss about those that choose to follow, just that it is concerned with what is in their pockets and how to patch them up when the pennies and stones fall through!

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    2. P.s on this
      Molly Malone!!! Forgot my name

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    3. The Church has not gone belly up. lol. Are you nuts?! Of course the Chruch keeps to the same teachings. lol. It's not populist - neither was Jesus. It's easy to throw your hands up in the air and walk away because the truth doesn't suit you. Here's a news flash! The church hierarchy is only human! Sure they make mistakes- don't we all! Pat Buckley will surely admit he has probably made a few himself. But to say it's belly up is totally ridiculous. Absurd.

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    4. I think you are very unfair to say the Church is only interested in money. Might I remind you that Pat Buckley's Oratory is the property of the Church. I'm sure it is worth plenty. If they are so money grabbing why haven't they turfed him out? I know plenty of priests who live extremely frugal lives. They certainly aren't money grabbing. In fact I've known many priests in the past who would stick their hand in their pocket to give you a few quid if they see you are in a desperate situation. No one ever talks about the good priests like them. I think the bible has a word for people like you: false accuser.

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    5. For the sake of clarity can I remind you that I live here by arrangement with the Church agreed in the Belfast High Court. The question of "turfing out" does not arise.

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  11. MMM I think you are on dangerous ground. It seems you are close to blaspheming the Holy Spirit. And as you should know - that is not good.

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    1. MourneManMichael26 May 2016 at 00:16

      Sorry Anon @ 21:00, for I've always lived 'dangerously' and near the 'edge'. So I 'don't know', for the only 'holy spirit' I recognise comes in bottles: Black Bush, Tullamore Dew and Powers are my favourites.
      Slainte mhaith.
      MMM

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    2. MMM, I'm glad you like Tullamore Dew which is made where I was born and was the distillery in which my forebears worked.

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  12. I dreaded changes in the old days Thought I'd be fecked off to the back of beyond without a satnav. Anyway good to see laypeople included in the shuffle. Also doesnt health reasons cover a multitude

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  13. There's no need to worry about a certain upwardly-mobile cleric. He's not going anwwhere. It's known on the Navan Road and in Rome that he blotted his copy book in matters financial. Very shortly before a current bishop's appointment was to be announced (less that 24 hours one is led to believe)this cleric was one of those who needed to know to arrange the press conference etc. With his inside knowledge he put a large bet in a bookies on the right man (and a few of his acquaintances whom he had informed did the same.) They won the bet of course but the bookeis smelt a rat and made representation. When Rome found out, hands were slapped, knuckles rapped, and clerical promotion is now far less likely because of his love of mammon. That would not be a good quallity in a bishop.

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