Friday, 12 August 2016

MAYNOOTH HOLDS A BISHOP'S BALL

MAYNOOTH HOLDS A BISHOP'S BALL

After the resounding success of Maynooth's STRICTLY COME DANCING NIGHT 







- the Irish Catholic Bishops decided to hold a BISHOP'S BALL last night in The Glenroyal Hotel in Maynooth where Monsignor Cowboy Connolly goes to work out in the gym

There were FOUR FINALISTS in the BISHOP'S BALL NIGHT -

Ms Aimy Martin -formerly MISS ARMAGH

Ms Donna McKeown - formerly MISS DERRY

Ms Joanne Buckley - formerly MISS CORK

Ms Derbhala Martin - formerly MISS DUBLIN

The FIRST PRIZE was an all expenses paid to the RORY COYLE SEX ADDICTION in the USA with first class seats on BLESSED VIRGIN AIRLINES.

The SECOND PRIZE was an all expenses paid trip to Kerry for this year's KING PUCK competition and an a la carte dinner with Deacon Sean Jones in the two Michelin star FAIRY THORN restaurant 

The THIRD PRIZE was a year's Gold Subscription to GRINDR.

The FOURTH PRIZE was a year's Sex Therapy Course with the Maynooth Formation Team.

WWW.THINKINGCATHOLICISM.BLOGSPOT can announce today EXCLUSIVELY that the winners of the MAYNOOTH BISHOP'S BALL were as follows:

FIRST PLACE goes to MS AMY MARTIN - MISS ARMAGH


MS AMY MARTIN - MISS ARMAGH
Amy told the blog - "I'M ABSOLUTELY OVER THE MOON TO SEE ARMAGH IN THE PRIMAL PLACE AGAIN - PLUS IT WILL GIVE ME A CHANCE TO VISIT DEAR RO-REE. I HAVE NOT SLEPT SINCE HE LEFT".

Well done Amy - we always knew you had it in you. Your Mammy will be over the moon for you.

SECOND PLACE goes to MS JOANNE BUCKLEY - MISS CORK

MS JOANNE BUCKLEY - MISS CORK
Holding tears back Joanne said: "I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS. ITS BEYOND MY WILDEST DREAMS".

She has also been told by Deacon Jones that he will secure her the modelling account for MAGILICCUDDY REEKS jockstraps and underwear.

THIRD PLACE goes to MISS DUBLIN 


Ms Derbhala Martin - Miss Dublin 
Derbhala, who is the CEO of Grinder Ireland has made a great success of interviewing the Grindr App to the Irish Population.

She is looking forward to saving a year's subscription and also promoting the Grindr App in Rome's semen-aries. 

FOURTH PLACE goes to MISS DERRY

Ms Donna McKeown - Miss Derry
Donna cannot believe her luck. She told us: "I'M SO LOOKING FORWARD TO SPENDING A YEAR WITH MESSERS CONNOLLY, MULLANEY, COLLINS AND PRIOR AS UP TO NOW I HAVE ONLY BEEN ABLE TO RIDE A BIKE".


THE BISHOP'S BALL earned Euro 10,321.09 for Maynooth Seminary and it will be spend on upgrading the college WI FI so that staff and students will have quickie access to the Internet.

The Bishops are very grateful to those who provided the music for the evening - THE KRAKOW FOUR:


THE KRAKOW FOUR

A very special thanks to their leader Singer DICKY BYRNE who was trained in the Pro Cathedral School of Music by Maestro O'Rahelli.


DICKY BYRNE 

The RAFFLE PRIZE on the night was a self portrait by Rory Coyle in the Van Gogh style which Rory completed as part of his art therapy in the US Sex Clinic

The winner of the portrait was a Sr Breege O'Neill with an address as independentpanel2@gmail,com





The next BISHOP'S BALL will be later this month and will be a GALA EVENING to welcome the new first year semen-arians.

Grind yer heart out !!! 



MAYNOOTH - THE MONEY

One of the Blog's most active comment makers sent in the following comment yesterday:

"PAT, FOLLOW THE MONEY IF YOU WANT TO NAIL THEM. AL CAPONE DID NOT GO DOWN FOR KILLING ANYONE/ HE GOT JAILED FOR FIDDLING HIS ACCOUNTS" (RASPUTIN)




It was an interesting comment because I heard recently that the TRUTH TELLER Monsignor Hugh Connolly is heading to the USA next month to collect funds for Maynooth and is expected to come home with £100,000 +++ from the US based FRIENDS OF MAYNOOTH.

DISGRACED MICHAEL LEDWITH


According to some sources the brother of the disgraced Maynooth president - Monsignor Michael Ledwith is involved in the fundraising - a DR THOMAS LEDWITH.





26 comments:

  1. LOL. Pat you are so right to use satire and humour on the Maynooth scsndal because if we did not laugh we would cry. PP Cork. I'm glad my man won a prize :-)

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  2. You put allot of time and effort into this. However I cant see how it adds to or takes from the issue. Am I getting old and cynical...?

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    Replies
    1. Yes :-) The theme of todays Blog is that these guys are a laughing stock.

      And do not worry - we have plenty of heavy duty stuff to address WTS

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    2. Corrigenda BISHOPS' Ball

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  3. Fair comment Pat. There's a book in this somewhere

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  4. The Kraków four look like a boyband alright Pat :-)

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  5. Sorry, but since when did Irish bishops have balls?

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    Replies
    1. True.If you put the whole lot of them into a lab you would be hard put to fill a timble full with testicular tissue!

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  6. Eamon...has only got one ball
    Diarmuid...has two but very small
    Crean's...are like two beans
    But poor Donal...has no balls at all!

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    Replies
    1. Are you saying that Miss Armagh has a "non ascended testicle"?

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    2. Maybe not even a descended one Pat!

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  7. Pat
    Blame it on Friday afternoon but the blog is nose diving into the depths of purile!
    On the other hand I must confess Amy can hit those soprano notes with relative ease durring high mass!!

    Kind Regards
    Rasputin

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  8. Holy Shit!
    Just watched the strictly youtube upload. I am now a firm advocate of eugenics to halt this mess. On a positive note Darwinian rules apply so few of the 'Priesty Boys' will propagate their species....

    Rasputin

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  9. I am the only one who noticed than on two ocassions yesterday at Bishop Dalys funeral when Ab Eamon Martin was being interviewed a spin doctor type was by his side ready to jump in should the Ab be asked any awkward questions.

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  10. 17:47 are you suggesting that Amy is limp-wristed and in capable of presrnting a coherent argument on his own without minders? Very worrying
    ....

    Rasputin

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  11. Boarding my plane to Ireland. Can't wait to get home to the toxic isle!
    Armed with garlic, holy water and a wooden stake in case I bump into some of the priesty boys featuring on this blog!! Hope i dont meet yellow teeth....forgot the silver bullet!

    Rasputin

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    Replies
    1. Speaking of money:
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uBd48bvFbTI

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  12. Any room for puffy the misfire slayer

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  13. Pat. Any chance of getting a new blog post on the latest status on Rasharkin and Drumbo. They seem to have gone off the radar that suits Lisbreen.

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  14. I wonder how many hits on Polish Grindr during World Youth Day? #purify_the_church

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    Replies
    1. I can only tell you that duriny WYD the hits on this Blog went balistic :-)

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  15. A letter-writer to the IT, on Aug 12th, muses, in response to Colm Fitzpatrick (Aug 10th): "all Catholics are called to be chaste”. By whom? I am not aware that Jesus made any such requirement of his followers".

    Declan Kelly from Dingle, who wrote the letter, obviously has not read the New Testament.

    Maybe he is a close friend of King Puck for all we know? He obviously adheres to the King Puck School of Theology that holds sway in Maynooth.

    Our Lord Jesus Christ clearly identified sexual immorality, of every kind, both heterosexual and homosexual, as EVIL, in Matthew 15:17-19.

    Fornication, lasciviousness and promiscuity are condemned, repeatedly, in the New Testament.

    At the core of this crisis is the perception that some Gaynooth seminarians have the morals of farmyard cats!

    Central, also, to this scandal, is that these "cats" are very comfortably curled up in the laps of certain enabling and abetting members of staff and irish bishops.!!!!


    Don't blame Pat Buckley for this scandal!

    Every baptised Catholic is called to chastity. Seminarians, in particular, must be beyond reproach.

    Any seminarian, who has been repeatedly breaking the 6th Commandment, will never be a holy and faithful priest of the Church.

    For any bishop to ordain such a man would be the gravest dereliction of duty and shockingly irresponsible.

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    Replies
    1. You'd be surprised, then, by what children in our Catholic schools are nowadays taught about "responsible relationships" and "safe sex".

      Listening very carefully to Diarmuid Martin it was clear only that he is against excessive promiscuity.

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    2. The "farmyard cats" are purring their way to ordination whilst genuine vocations are expelled! Crazy but true!

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  16. Bishop Pat, You are doing the church a great service by unearthing the filthy underlay. We all know prophets are hated and reviled.The clerical mindset is still strong in the church and averse to accountability. perceiving themselves as part of a caste above and beyond mere mortals, they hate to be criticised from below. This was never Christ's intention. Clericalism is pharisaism. You are the only priest with the courage to tell it as it is. You are not financially dependent on the system. This gives you a great independence. Would you ever consider using your sociological and journalistic skills to do an all ireland audit on the state of the church here and publish your findings? The maynooth saga is only the tip of the iceberg. We all know that celibacy is not being lived by a sizeable percentage of clergy. This scandal needs to be brought into the light. And the codependent behavior of parishioners and organisations like the ACP must also be challenged. Turning a blind eye can only lead to further problems down the line. Bishops are addicted to the status quo, especially when it comes to celibacy. Like addicts they refuse to listen. Maybe we need someone like you to initiate an intervention. maybe you should write a book and without naming names give an account of the church as it is today especially on the matter of celibacy and the abuse of vulnerable adults. Your knowledge of the underbelly is extensive and should be published. Although this blog is read by thousands, I imagine many are clergy themselves and people who can healthily criticise the church. You need to get the message to a wider audience especially those faithful catholics who either are unaware of what's going on or who are so pathologically loyal that they refuse to acknowledge any misbehaviour in their clergy. Even when they do, they don't hold them to account but rally around them like mother hens. They deserve better and must stop this codependent behaviour which amouts to condoning immoral behaviour. I think writing a book might reach much more people and might be another small step in renewing the church. Refusing to acknowledge the truth will only entrench and empower the dysfunction and dishonesty that is already rampant. The father knows best pathology must be laid to rest once and for all. Most clerics are just average people like the rest of us and when given a sense that they are special and untouchable they will be strongly tempted to abuse that privilege if there are not checks and balances in place.

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  17. MourneManMichael13 August 2016 at 11:24

    Dear Anon @01:42 you and I clearly differ in our perspective on that perfectly normal animal function and appetite otherwise referred to as sex! Opinions on the matter are largely formed by familial upbringing, social customs and "teachings" derived from prescriptive directions, many of the latter being based in a myriad of religious beliefs which are widely divergent worldwide and throughout history.
    At this point in history, many people in Western society are 'locked into' a quasi puritanical belief system concerning sex where it has an almost central relevance and focus as something bordering on an unhealthy but regrettably necessary function which must be kept restrained except in certain well defined and prescribed circumstances. Within the Christian traditions the necessary 'permissions' are as prescribed by the bible and subsequently interpreted by the clergy. The Irish RC church adherents in particular have traditionally fallen into that spectrum of almost rigid conformity to this narrow puritanical outlook on sexual matters.
    So as a humanist, in relation to sexual matters, I have to say I'm bemused by those who believe in and follow the highly selective prescriptions of a collection of ancient writings the origins and relevance of which many historians, biblical scholars et alia continue to disagree about.
    As for those who quote selected biblical passages, [eg. your Matthew 15. 17-19] to support a viewpoint, claiming that the Bible is the central 'rulebook' for behaviour, they conveniently ignore so much of the hogwash elsewhere in the Bible! Just sticking with your own selected Bible chapter, ie Matthew 15, how do you 'explain Matt. 15.4-7 " Children who curse their parents must be killed"?
    So I find cherry picking bible justifications and pirouettes of religious moralists ridiculous, and certainly not a reliable guide for living responsibly and considerately.
    But having been brought up within the narrow confines of traditional RC orthodoxy concerning sex, I can understand how and why so many still retain limited traditional beliefs. Clinging to the apparant probity of handed down beliefs is a balm for many, just as long as their 'human failings' can be erased by relieving trips to the confessional!
    MMM

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