Sunday, 18 December 2016



Maynooth seminary are looking for a new president to replace Saint Hugh Connolly.

The advertisement below appeared in three Irish Catholic Publications:

INTERCOM - The periodical for priests

INTERLINK - The periodical for nuns

INTERFERE - the periodical for bishops.

A shorter version of the ad appeared in the national newspapers





A president is required for St Patrick’s College, Maynooth, to fill the vacancy that will occur with the departure of the current incumbent Monsignor Hugh “Cowboy” Connolly on May 31st 2017.

Candidates must be 35 + years of age and must be Catholic priests in good standing *

The appointed candidate will be a priest who has a reputation for being celibate irregardless of whether that reputation is accurate. He will be expected to be either a Fellow or Member of the RHFOD (Royal Hibernian Friends of Dorothy) or someone who has sympathy with the aims and policies of the RHFOD.

Ideally the appointed candidate will be conversant with the Papal Bull: ARS EST MENTIRI – (The Art of the Lie) and will have a proven track record in Pope John Paul 11’s Theology of the Mental Reservation.

In the management of the seminary staff and seminarians he will be capable of displaying on a daily basis the spiritual qualities of ignorance, sarcasm, jealousy, contempt, stubbornness, vindictiveness, mercilessness, prayer-less-ness, lack of faith, cynicism and any other spiritual qualities that will keep people in their rightful place.

Above all else the new president will be expected to value the virtue of obedience to the seminary Trustees – the four Catholic archbishops, the 13 Catholic bishops, and indeed all the bishops of Ireland. To that end the new president will be asked to swear a Vow of Absolute Obedience to the Bishop’s Conference. He will never question a decision by a bishop and only offer his advice to a bishop when it is explicitly requested.

Among his other duties the new president will be responsible for the upkeep of the bishop’s suites in the college. These suites should, in consultation with each bishop, be redecorated and refurnished annually and be left prepared at all times for the arrival of each bishop. The bishop’s choice of single / double or king size bed should be at all times respected and the sheets should be of Egyptian linen and the bedroom contain both summer and winter duck down duvets. The suite mini bar should always be kept stocked with each bishop’s individual refreshment preferences.

Experience is preferred although not essential. Candidates must have poor communication skills, be inflexible and have a negative attitude.

You will not require a Criminal Records Bureau check. The job is not dependant on suitable references but rather on nepotism.

The hours required are left to the indiscretion of the appointed candidate.

The rate of pay is £ SECRET.

For an application form please contact Rev Fr. Rory Coyle c/o Ara Coeli, Cathedral Road, Armagh on 0044 28 37 522045 email:

*A priest in good standing is a canonical term meaning a priest who has never broken the 11th commandment: “Thou shalt not be found out”.



Of course the clerical rumour mill is beginning to wag about a possible new president - in spite of the fact that many clerics are still talking about Father X and his DUP lover.

The older clerics think that the current Vice President - Father Fanny Mullaney has the job in the bag already and the advertising is just a publicity stunt.

Fr Fanny

I think that if Fanny is passed over she will be very unhappy and the new president might find her hard to work with. 

Another rumour is that Sean The Wounded Healer Brady is pushing hard to have Father Paul Prior - one of the Directors of Formation appointed to the job. 

Fr Pryer



But then there is the spectre of Rome hanging over all the proceedings. The Irish Bishops are due in Rome in January for the 5 years AD LIMINA visit - the 5 yearly inspection by Rome.

A number of Roman cardinals are very unhappy about Maynooth - especially since this summer's GRINDR scandal and the talk is that they want Maynooth to cease to be a seminary. Apparently this has already been mentioned to Pope Francis in some meetings. 

The Rome preference is to have all Irish seminarians trained, for the time being in Rome, where a closer eye can be kept.

Our Roman sources tell us that DIARMUID MARTIN of Dublin is pushing for this plan. 

Most of the Irish Bishops will be unhappy about this and will fight hard to save Maynooth - but of course if Rome is determined she will get what she wants.

Our Roman sources also tell us that certain authorities in Rome have had a word in the ear of the Irish papal nuncio about these matters and he is currently taking soundings. 


  1. I wonder about these church jobs. Do they have to advertise. I imagine they already know who they want. Reminds me of school jobs in the old days (? Now). Most of them were done deals.

  2. I'm sure the many thousands of people struggling with abuse,sickness, old age, poverty, unemployment,addiction and loss all over the country will be worried sick about who the new Maynooth president will be! To borrow from the words of the great armchair philosopher Jim Royle, who gives two shiny sh**es?

  3. I suppose those who are part of Maynooth have carved out their own mythological kingdom. They might drop a shiney or two.

  4. I agree. This blog very often focuses on the negatives.Maybe more attention should be given to positivety.Better to light a match than complain about the darkness.

    1. You have room to talk 'Concerned' after starting that jokes row on yesterdays blog and then set about deleting your silly jokes after the row began. If you want more positive stories go and read some children's books.

  5. I believe for some reason or other they have to post the job description even if they have someone in mind. I see it a lot in the U.S.A regarding Parish Ministry positions.

  6. No word in the Northern "Sundays" about the Big Dean?

    Surprised the local media haven't picked up on Fr X and his young DUP beau.

    Perhaps Fr X has taken out a superinjunction? LOL

  7. Looking down at the congregation this morning, thinking of what is revealed continuously on this web page, I cannot help but think: the deadliest and most effective enemies - of the Faith, the Church and the priesthood - are some of my fellow priests and those bishops who allow them to run amok.

    1. Thank you, 15:03, for your honesty. It makes a surprising (almost shocking) change to hear a Roman Catholic priest speak the truth.

      Yes, the whore of Babylon: it has always, and ever will be, the priesthood.

      Study Roman Catholic Church history and you'll discover that every crisis in its history has had clergy at the heart of it. They are destroying the Church. And yet, there remain misguided idiots (mostly elderly fools) who defend the clergy at every turn and who continue to drop cash into their ever-grasping hands.

      If you want to know the number of the beast, its the clergy-count in the Church. Beware the beast.

  8. Trouble is, corruption is like am abscess. It infects the whole body.

  9. If Rome is thinking of closing Maynooth what better way to obstruct Rome than to advertise and appoint a new president before the meetings next month? Really, My Lord Bishops? So transparent! But sadly, not the transparency that inspires confidence in you as Christian leaders!

  10. DUP have told the young one to lay low over Christmas and the New Year, to keep his mouth shut and not to see the Reverend in public. That figures because he was seen in Victoria Square shopping alone yesterday, all dressed in his designer gear He's always around there and he wasn't in Argos or Primark, he had bags from Boss, Apple Store, Tommy Hilfiger and Hollister. Very expensive tastes for 17 year old, I wonder how he explains it all to the Orange Father. Fr X is not as middle aged as some make out you know.
    Toot observer

  11. Is Maynooth the only senior seminary left in Ireland?
    What has happened with the others, and when?
    Has anyone got the figures for the number of seminarians now being trained in Ireland, both for Irish dioceses, and for posts elsewhere? And how many are currently in training elsewhere, eg Rome, for Irish dioceses?
    The regular impression given is of a very great decline in priests available to Irish parishes; of the average ages of those currently in post being 60+, and that demographically the Irish RC church is in a terminal decline which is being blindly ignored by the RC hierarchy refusing to face up to the implications.
    Would be helpful to have some factual information.

    1. Maynooth IS the only seminary for secular priests ( non religious) left in Ireland.

      In the past 20 / 30 years the following seminaries have closed:

      1. All Hallows, Dublin
      2. Clonliffe, Dublin.
      3. St John's Waterford.
      4. St Peter's Wexford.
      5. St Kieran's, Kilkenny.
      6. St Patrick's, Thurles.
      7 St Patrick's, Carlow.

      Currently there are circa 50 diocesan seminarians in Maynooth.

      In the old days that would have been 500+

      When I entered Clonmliffe in 1970 - there were 120 seminarians just for Dublin.

      When I entered Waterford in 1973 there were 60+

      Many of the religious orders have closed their large novitiates and training colleges.

      AND - As Father Des Wilson of Belfast says:

      "Young nuns are now as scarce as the corncrake".

    2. PS: In 2014, 49,153 parishes in the world had no resident priest pastor.

    3. MMM take a look at some of the personnel in many dioceses up and down the country and you'll see there is a steady trend of importing foreign priests from India, the Philippines, Nigeria etc. Some dioceses now read like the UN. That's the latest solution for the shortage for good or ill who knows?

  12. I imagine priestly training in future will be more parish/deanery based with students commuting to college. Is the church ready for this....

  13. Maybe the use of foreign priests is part of social evolution. It does seem to be a quick fix to a problem that will not go away. Ireland is now a mission territory. Perhaps these priests will be its salvation

    1. Are you kidding, Sean Page? How can any priest be anyone's salvation? His tormentor? Yes. His crucifier? Absolutely.

      You seem to have learned nothing from the ongoing clergy scandals.

      One thing I have learned about Catholic priests: they are loyal to themselves and to the institutional Church, not to Christ. And one of the casualties of this dysfunctionality is truth.

      How can these truth-killers be anyone's salvation?

      These imported priests will bring their own scandal in time to come.

    2. You are right, sadly.

      Celibacy etc means even less in Africa, South American and India.

    3. Do they come to escape poverty or is it pure missionary zeal or a bit of both? Ireland is the last place where I'd want to be a priest ministering to cultural catholics. The only plus would be the money and relatively high standard of living and rent free presbytery.

    4. 19.48
      This is a totally unjustified generalisation, typical of Bishop Buckley's frequent sorehead bloggers.
      There are many excellent and dedicated priests who look after the sick, the dying, the bereaved, the poor and are appreciated by their parishioners.
      I have noticed that priests of this type are quiet, stay in the background men, who avoid publicity and stay clear of Bishops. There are many of them and they couldn't care less of how they are treated in their dioceses - they do their work well, and the care of their parishioners is their only priority.
      I have always, fortunately perhaps, had priests in my parish in whom I have absolute and total trust.
      And I am not alone in this.

    5. "Sorehead blogger"? Wow! That's intelligent comment; persuasive, too. You sure know how to win an argument while bringing your opponents t'Jesus.

      Priests (ALL priests), by nature of their vow of obedience to higher ecclesiastical authority, are , inevitably, bound to suppress conscience...if they are to remain faithful to that vow. As Paul the Apostle declares that the law of God is written on the human heart, then the voice of God, through conscience, will be stilled through ridgid compliance with such authority. It is why Cardinal Sean Brady, even to this day, can maintain the delusion that, in 1975, he did nothing morally wrong when he helped investigate (and he did investigate, despite his playing down of the role he had) the claims of sexual abuse against Fr Brendan Smyth. And how does he do this? By arguing that he acted in full accord with the requirements of Canon Law in the matter.

      Rigid adherence to man-made laws (Canon Law) kills conscience. It is why Jesus was so severe with the Pharisees on occasion; they prioritized their equivalent of Canon Law (the 612 (or 613) prescriptions added to Mosaic Law) over God's law: justice, mercy, compassion.

      Human nature is a constant in global history; so, too, is moral weakness and temptation. This weakness WILL manifest itself, in time, in the behaviour of these foreign priests. You are seriously deluding yourself to think otherwise.

  14. A group of Kerala catholics have taken over St Ignatius parish in Preston Lancashire. They are a very vibrant congregation and put the rest of us to shame.

    1. An acqaintance of mine in a UK parish says the mass attendance there has been decimated since a priest from India came. Apparently he's a tyrant and speaks down to everyone. His way or no way.They even complained him to the local bishop.

    2. Ooh! I didn't know that. You can't get away with that anymore.

  15. Frankly the Irish laity, with their blank faces, zero interest in any intellectual thought, who think that the Church is there to provide a social life, their continual moaning accompanied by a lack of action, who go into meltdown if the homily lasts longer than 4 minutes and who think that the priest is there to do their religion for them aren't exactly an inspiring group either. The Irish laity have the priests they deserve. And since this is a sex blog, their sexual standards aren't any better than those of priests.

  16. 19.48. It is Christ who saves not priests. If the church is to be saved all sides will need to let go of hate while not deminishing wrongs done or the responsibility to own up to the truth

    1. Yes, it is Christ who saves, not the clergy. You and I acknowledge this fundamental truth, but most Roman Catholic priests are too self-aggrandizing to think otherwise. And there's the rub.

  17. Maynooth is a soon to be extinguished symbol of perverted Irish Catholicism and anachronistic model of priestly training that is not fit for purpose or the needs of twenty first century Ireland.

    I pray to God that Rome will put genuine Irish Catholics out of their misery soon, and shut the bloody place down finally for once and for all.

  18. I'd like to see you apply Pat. See what happens. Let you test them and their recruitment methodology.

  19. 20 27. You paint an accurate picture. In a sense the RC Church has created its own monster in the name of control. People are not stupid just conditioned over centuries. I don't think this was ever meant to be a sex block but the church seems preoccupied with sex

  20. I wonder if Fr X was a member of the Congregation of St Sebastian. This was published in 2003.

  21. Is possessing a large and colurful underwear collection one of criteria for the Presidency of Gaynooth? If so, one of the staff members is in with a shout. I was in his class and there was nothing he liked better than spreading his large underwear collection across his bed in Long Corridor, for visitors to admire.