Tuesday 31 October 2017

SEX versus REPRESSION






Ireland’s millennials are sexually liberated – and losing their religion

Historian Dr. Ciara Meehan

IRELAND’S younger generation are among the most sexually liberal millennials in Europe – and are losing their religion.

The nation’s young people have given a snapshot of their take on 21st-century life as part of one of the biggest pan-European surveys into the attitudes of more than a million millennials across Europe.

In the two-part RTÉ2 series ‘Generation What?’, Irish millennials answer 149 questions from sex to politics, to media and equality, in the survey of 18 to 34-year-olds in 14 countries.

The Irish were the most likely of all nationalities surveyed to have had sex in a public place – with 55pc saying they have braved the elements to have sex.

The programme-makers suggest the ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ effect could have influenced the 15pc of Irish millennials who said they had tried S&M, which is second only to Greece.

Three out of 10 Irish millennials said they had made love with someone from the same sex, or they would like to.

Sociologist Kevin Myers, who helped analyze the results along with the Department of Sociology in UCD, said the results showed sexual liberal attitudes in young Irish people.

“Among male participants, 78pc answered they wouldn’t be happy without sex. For females, it was a slightly smaller number, at 70pc. We can see that there does seem to be a movement towards much more liberal attitudes to sexual preferences and sex acts in general.

“30pc answered they had made love with someone of the same sex, or they would like to.

“Of this, males were more likely to have made love with someone of the same sex, but women were the ones most likely to want to.

“This does give us the impression that Irish moral attitudes towards sexuality are increasingly liberal.”

Meanwhile, 80pc of young Irish people said they would be happy without a religious belief.

When it came to what community they felt they belonged to, out of eight options, nationality was at the top of the list, with only 7pc saying religion was the most important to them.

Equality

“Belonging to a religious organization didn’t seem to be of particular interest to millennials. It is a common pattern through (countries) in the study,” said Mr. Myers.

Six out of 10 millennials agreed that Ireland is still a long way from gender equality – but this figure was split into more than two-thirds of women, but less than half of men.

Dr. Ciara Meehan, an expert in modern Irish history, said several key factors have influenced the minds of this generation. “I think a lot of the big changes date back to the 1990s. If you think about the legalization of divorce, the decriminalization of homosexuality, the election of Mary Robinson as the first female President of Ireland, and the Good Friday Agreement,” she said.

“This millennial crop is the first to be completely immersed in digital and social media, and as a result of that they are much more globalized citizens than previous generations.”





PAT SAYS:

This latest survey is both interesting and informative.

In my opinion, the current situation with regard to young people, religion, and sex is far healthier than thing were when I was growing up in Ireland in the 60s and 70s.

I was not alone in suffering greatly from the sex-obsessed Catholic Ireland in which we lived.

I was troubled by sexual repression for the 20 years between puberty and my mid 30s and I found all those years a pure agony. I was running to Confession every few days confession "impure thoughts" and "impure actions" and being quizzed by priests as to the exact nature, content etc of my MORTAL sins.

I was made to feel "dirty" and evil and that I was on the road to thousands of years in Purgatory if not Hell itself.

As one priest said to me recently: "Pat, they would not allow us to get rid of our semen and it went to our heads and made us mad"!




I finally resolved all my contradictions and confusions when in my late 30s and early 40s I voluntarily engaged in counseling and therapy and became free of all my past burdens.

Looking back at that painful time in my left - between the ages of 14 and 35 - I have two feelings:

1. Regret at turning down all the various opportunities for personal and sexual intimacy I was offered by nice people.

2. An appreciation of how the self-discipline I exercised (albeit it not always voluntarily) helped me to say NO to situations that might have been "harmful" to myself or others.

Were I to do it all again I think I would have allowed myself to have at least some more happiness and pleasure.

I can at least fantasize about the "only ifs" and "might have beens" :-)

 I really believe that our attitude to sex should be more liberal and permissive.

Of course, I believe that, in sexuality, as in all the areas of our lives, there should be certain basic moral principles. Not using or abusing people is one of those principles.

But I also believe that many a suicide and many a mental breakdown could have been prevented had the victims had access to some sexual intimacy and pleasure.

In many cases, 10 mg of sex may be more effective than 60mg of diazepam or Seroxat!



77 comments:

  1. Sorry, I don't quite understand, Pat.. So you spend the last year condemning promiscuity in Maynooth and by those who use Grindr but now!! - - You are regretting not having spent a more promiscuous youth.. It doesn't add up, buddy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I knew you would say this :-)

      The moral issues in Maynooth were not about sex.

      They were about hypocrisy, pretence and double standards.

      Public celibate having sex.

      Celibates preaching continence and chastity but behaving in an opposite way.

      Sexual abuse of others.

      Homosexuals discriminating against heterosexuals.

      Whistleblowers being shafted.

      Etc, etc.

      I do not regret not having a promiscuous youth.

      I PARTLY regret not having responded to those who offered me LOVE and INTIMACY.

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    2. Ah... the rose-tinted glasses of retrospect... It hits you in your sixties!... But that's just it,Pat.. an illusion. The reality would not have been at all what you imagine..

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  2. You often quote the Scriptures.. Tell me this.. Do you believe the teaching at Matthew Ch.5 at all?

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  3. Pat, as we travel and mix with people in many countries and in many different kinds of communities, we have found that the very "unrepessed" and with few boundaries attitudes and practice of sex is pretty commonplace in some countries but certainly not all. We saw very little evidence, however, that the liberation was adding anything to people's happiness and contentment. In fact it was often very much the opposite.
    What you don't or didn't have can often seem very attractive but the reality is something else.

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  4. Sex with different partners can be joyless and unsatisfying and in the end you feel used and emotionally empty. Have no regrets that you missed out Pat. Believe me, you didn't! Plenty of dissatisfied people are emotionally damaged and physically diseased. Respect for one's own body and the bodies of others will guide you to a happier existence. Are people happier now in these wonderfully liberated days? Really?
    What is the comparison in present day misuse of drugs?
    Have the number of suicides gone up or down? What about the suicide rates among today's "unrepessed" young men?
    Are more marriages lasting longer now than those in the past? - - Far from it!
    Are these new "happily unrepessed" people apparently content and not being tempted into promiscuous websites hungrily still searching for that elusive happiness? Are you sure? - -
    Where does morality come into this and how will I account in the Final Reckoning for my choices? Was Jesus totally misleading us when He said that the "pure of heart" would be specially blessed
    and that they would "see God?
    So there's a lot to think about!

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    1. You make many valuable points @1.59

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  5. Pat, if you luved in the real world, as I do, you'd have sonething more worthwhile and relevant to blog about, like having to get up early for "real" work, earlier than normal because of a rail/bus strike! Also on Feast of All Saints - the Gospel of Beatitudes would have been more inspiring, noble and reflective for all of us as a counter antidote to the item you have today. Another missed moment due to your unhealthy, obsessive preoccupation with matters sexual. Incidentally if anyone is a parent, the above blog's content isn't new - they are well aware of the progressive sexual pressures heaped on their children in society. It's the young and their parents we need to care for.

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  6. I can say that I have never felt better since I started to live a pure life.
    I have had loads of 1 night stands sex outside the lot and i was terribly depressed at times suicidal. Your post does not give the full version of reality among the modern irish Pat. Peace truth and blessings to you & your community.

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    1. I once saw a billboard add for vodka that reminded me of what the absence of intimacy can do to some people - some priests, nuns etc,

      SO PURE IT'S WICKED.

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    2. Do not confuse sexual encounters with the emotional satisfaction of intimacy.
      Also the word "wicked" (like the word "gay" which used to merely mean happy and full of fun) has taken on a slight change of meaning during the last five years or so as it became part of the cool youth urban vocabulary. In its NEW usage it no longer means "evil".. quite the opposite! For example, if I tell one of the teenagers I have bought them a ticket for concert by *****, they will be delighted and shout "Wow! Wicked! Gee thanks..! They will attend and come back and tell their friends about it. It was great! Wicked! The word in your advertisement is definitely the urban" wicked ". Nothing at all to do with badness. Get up to date, Pat!

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    3. Purity in former generations most often meant an unrealistic aiming for the elimination of sexual desire and sexual feelings. For that reason it’s easy to see how it led to neurosis.

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  7. Well said Pat, reminded me of this interview with Sir John Betjeman. https://youtu.be/EJ1yCEPwLH8

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  8. Here we go again. The high priest of liberalism lecturing a free for all attitude, with a complete disregard for the consequences of personal choices. Sexuality is an integral part of our humanity, a beautiful gift, not to be abused or debased in Pat's "do what you like" approach. He, of all of us, knows the personal effects of being reckless and irresponsible in using sexuality. Yes, intimate sexual engagement with another human being is wonderful but only when experienced in the right context. Our society needs to rediscover that with choice comes responsibilities and to approach sexuality in Pat's free for all, the consequences may be life changing and fatal with STD's......Let's preach integrity, moral responsibility and self respect....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I do not advocate a free for all.

      I believe that sex is best and most satisfying in the context of live and intimacy.

      I agree that sexual addiction is destructive.

      But I do not believe that you can only find love and intimacy in A Roman Catholic marriage.

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    2. Get real and be truthful Pat. Your past life was "moralless". You condemn the sexual promiscuuty of other clerics but you have no problem with advocating being promiscuous in search of love. Thank God you're not teaching my children. Such reckless beliefs are an endangerment to children and teenagers. Crazy, foolish libertarian nonsense.

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    3. I attended an STD clinic in the Mater Hospital Dublin in the 1950s in good old Catholic Ireland. It was packed and run by a male nurse.

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    4. 9:54 I do not advocate promiscuity.

      It leads to its own problems.

      I am against sexual repression and the harm it causes.

      More marriages end because of the lack of sex rather than too much sex?

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    5. Dublin had a red light district then too.

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    6. I tell you one thing, religious people can often have an overly idealistic view of marriage. Sex is the last thing on my mind after a long day at work, picking up kids from school, dinner, going over days problems and worrying about tomorrow. I really think that the celibates have to little to be doing to be day dreaming bout marriage and sex.maybe ye could say more prayers for us lay people more. Like isn't that what your meant to do?

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  9. You sound like Harvey.

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  10. I see phonsie is at it again
    Free speech and all that

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  11. No, most marriages get into trouble when good honest communication and kindness breaks down. This of course, leads on to a host of other off shoot consequences.

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    1. My seminary lecturer in Moral Theology and Canon Law - Monsignor John Shine RIP used to tell us:

      "IF THERE IS A PROBLEM IN THE BEDROOM - THERE IS A PROBLEM"!

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    2. maybe its a leaky roof?

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    3. As if he had the slightest idea,!

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    4. We definitely have a problem in the bedroom going on for nearly two months It's mice. Once they get in, they are hard to get rid of. He put down one of them springer trap things with marmalade and cheese but stood on it going to throw stuff in the wardrobe. It skint the heel off him but they were able to save the foot. We are trying Marmite.

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    5. That's men for ye... They always put their foot in it.

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    6. Marmite is no good for a skint heel. You'd be better off trying Vaseline or a wee drop of tea tree oil.

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  12. 10 41
    Finished lecturing now.
    Is that the best u can do???

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    Replies
    1. It's a lot more than you have done. Easy to jibe...

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  13. Do you hsve sex Pat?

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    Replies
    1. Are you still affectionate with sheep? :-)

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    2. not everyone seeks the sexual act but they often find fulfillment and happiness in other acts of intimacy. I would know of mature gay couples who are happy to have the company, the cuddles and someone to share things and go places with. they are just as committed as the sexually active couple.

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    3. I agree that sexual intimacy is often more important in a relationship when the partners are young and that very often it gives way to other types of intimacy later on.

      Having said that I also know couples in their 80s who enjoy a good sex life.

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  14. Crazy blogging today .... Utterly inane contributions. ALL SAINTS FEAST DAY - Is this your best offer Pat? Why not present the beautiful gospel of the Beatitudes for a vision of moral, good living!!

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    1. ALL SAINTS ? Most of those saints were not celibate priests and nuns and had sex when they were in this life???

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    2. Pat.. Compare like with like.... You are not making sense today...

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    3. It's easy to mock and ridicule Pat. Thank God our Saints were and are very human....

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  15. Pat, honestly..! We despair.. Please talk sense..

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    Replies
    1. Maybe what I am really saying is that we need a while new theology of sexuality?

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    2. Sorry - - I am afraid the Ten Commandments are your guide and they will not be going out of fashion anytime soon.
      They cannot be re-invented or re-written to suit any present day whim.

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  16. To those who are outraged at Pat's writing today, those of Roman Catholic background need to think about some things before they condemn ethical but casual sex.

    St Joseph Calasanz who was made the patron saint of all the Catholic schools in the world by Pope Pius XII and praised by John Paul II covered up clerical child-abuse in the teaching order of priests he founded. The saint was canonised by Pope Clement XIII in 1767.

    The book, Fallen Order, by Karen Liebriech, was written when the author researched archives including those of the Inquisition and discovered how this monster fostered institutionalised child-abuse in his schools by protecting the offenders.

    He protected two of his top priests who maintained a paedophile ring in the schools for two decades. One of them, a Father Alacchi was known as a sadist. The Inquisition and the Roman Curia and the pope found out and decided to do nothing about it. They refused to do anything to support or protect the victims.

    Calasanz received a host of reports of child sexual abuse by his priests and he took every step to prevent the matter becoming public knowledge. He had plans executed to pacify the parents of the children and get the paedophile priests moved elsewhere.

    Fr Alacchi was promoted by the saint to a Visitor General role after learning that he was abusing children. Inevitably more allegations came in after this so the saint sent him on pilgrimage until it quietened down. Later the priest was invited back to his job and further allegations were made. The saint’s response to this was to give him another reward for his evil. Alacchi became Consulter General and Procurator. The saint put down the allegations as lies and shielded Alacchi.

    Father Stefano Cherubini was such a notorious paedophile that his wealthy family protected him by employing lawyers who engaged in intimidating those who made complaints and who stole a dossier from the saint’s desk that proved the crimes and destroyed it. He didn’t get punished by the saint. Instead he became second in charge of the order under the saint. Promotion was used to intimidate anybody making allegations.

    Cherubini became head of the order when Calasanz was dismissed due to machinations by the Jesuit Order which made him appear heretical. The pope had Cherubini inspected and the report cleared him.

    Cherubini was dismissed from his post as head of the order. Rome lied that the reason was administrative incompetence.

    He had been caught in the act abusing a pupil and a letter from a priest written in 1646 which admitted ten year knowledge of the child abusing activities of the monster. It said that the administrative incompetence was a cover-up.

    The miracles surrounding the saint include tales of the body and relics casing healings and after death his body had a smell of fresh roses.

    Needless to say Rome has made no plans to reverse this canonisation!

    ReplyDelete
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    1. What an oxymoron: "ethical but casual sex". Absolutely stupid statement. I have HIV as a result of casual sex. If I could turn back the clock how I would love too.

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    2. What you have done is what anyone could have done.. You have researched historical instances when the Church had the strong view that the most important thing was to protect, protect, protect its reputation at all costs. There are sadly still instances of that misjudgement but thank God we have gone a long way towards finally recognising the great damage done to abuse victims and its long-term effects.
      But nothing that you have catalogued here in any way negates the correct moral comments of many of today's excellent posters.
      Quite the opposite, I would have thought.

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    3. Clerics with "Concerns" wouldn't be visitors in this day and age though would they.....would they???

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  17. If men and women can't hack celibacy they do not have a vocation to be a catholic priest or nun. PLAIN & SIMPLE.

    Some people want things every way. They want to change God's laws and church discipline just to suit themselves. The same mumblers and grumblers then make life hell for the genuine vocations as well as bringing constant scandal on the church.

    I would say to the complainers, grumblers and cowards to get up of their lazy arses and get a lay job if they can't adhere to their vows.

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    Replies
    1. Good man! - - Crack the whip, boy!

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    2. How easily you disregard the vocations of the priests of the first millennium, the married Anglican priests and the Orthodox priests of both mellenia - including many who are in communion with Rome. But I guess you know a vocation when you see it... you should be on the seminary council in Maynooth with your fellow Muppets.

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    3. AT 14:05
      Welcome to the 21st Century were hundreds of Roman Catholic priests are married and living and working in parishes and other ministries.

      And the earth hasn't stopped rotating on its axis.

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    4. World may not have "stopping turning" as you put it, but it is not a better place to live in.

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    5. If it’s not, and that’s a suitable topic for debate, it’s not because significant numbers of priests are married.

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  18. God's laws we hear the likes trotted out along with church laws.
    Jesus updated the laws and it was centred in Love.

    Toss the man made aside and live the Gospel of Good News properly.

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    1. It appears you have not read the Gospels or New Testament Big Hank. Jesus taught love combined with huge responsibility and elevated the commandments to the level of thoughts, not just external behaviour.

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    2. Hank's first sentence is completely unintelligible. Why is it so lacking in punctuation?

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  19. What advice would a concerned parent give to their teenage son or daughter on the subject of sexuality and prevalent promiscuity?

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    Replies
    1. 'Come home pregnant and your going straight down the social welfare office. I'm not paying for that pram'

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    2. There should be absolute openness between parents and their children.

      Do not leave sex education to the school.

      Present parent preferred standards to young people.

      Talk to them about safe sex.

      If they insist on being sexually active help them to access protection and contraception.

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    3. I used a condom and still contracted HIV and other STI's. Be very careful what you recommend.

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    4. I'm not sure about absolute openness - I think a mutually-negotiated openness which doesn't cause either side discomfort is preferable. Personally I think too much intrusion by parents is worse than not dealing with sex at all.
      No contraceptive method is infallible (lol) frequently because of accidents or not using the method correctly. My sympathy goes to the reader at 20;08

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    5. "... you're going straight down the social welfare.."

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  20. http://www.radiokerry.ie/diocese-refuses-comment-kerry-seminarians/

    'Deacon Sean Jones continues in his full-time ministry as a deacon in the Diocese'

    are these people well in the head. This bucko caused an international storm in Maynooth. Its public knowledge. ordaining him for the sake of it will deepen things even further.

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    1. Maybe Sean Jones will remain a permanent deacon? I thought transitional deacons were ordained priest a year later but he's been hanging about Listowel parish a brave while.

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    2. A year by convention, any time after the 6 month mark is normal. I know two who have been transitional deacons about 6 years now.

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  21. If the findings of this survey are correct I'd say that the catechesis offered by Catholic schools has failed woefully. These young people will in many or most cases have Catholic schools. I suppose if the catechesis is the Alive-O programme this is bound to be the outcome.

    At what point will the defenders of the "Spirit of Vatican II" wake up and smell the coffee?

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    1. And your negative verdict on the effectiveness or otherwise of a General Council of the Church, called by the pope of the day and endorsed by ever pope since merits attention?

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  22. 14 .05
    Won’t be long until there are no seminarians, so what happens then ?
    Our married men will then offer mass.
    And hopefully our women.
    Really how much special study would any man or woman need, not an awful lot in my opinion

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    Replies
    1. There'll be no need, once the old liberal Catholic grey hairs have died off. Their children are lapsed, their grandchildren unbaptised. It's over.

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    2. And this is the country where our ancestors gave their very lives in Penal times to defend the Faith. Some of us would still gladly do that! May God in His mercy forgive the rest.

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  23. I don’t know what’s so shocking about this. The Irish Penetentials were the closest thing to porn for those on the continent. Some of the sins confessed made them look with awe upon Irish people.

    Indeed wasn’t the confessional system invented by the Irish? With good reason.

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    1. Auld Letterkenny Catholic1 November 2017 at 23:45

      Fr Hugh Connolly (well known to readers of this blog) did his doctorate on the sacrament of penance and the Irish penitentials. It was published as a book by the Opus Dei leaning Four Courts Press.

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    2. Your point being?

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  24. We all might say things might have been done differently in the past. There are things I am proud of and things I regret. All of them contributed to where I am now which thank God is a good place. The past is what it is. Make the most of the present.

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  25. It's all in the past.

    However, thankfully, you've exposed ordained pulpit pooves as well as trainee pulpit poovettes, who will all, I am sure, thank you in the end.

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    Replies
    1. Your own moral compass is being exposed here every time you take to the keyboard.

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  26. It's not a shock that millenials have no morals when they were raised by a generation of lapsed Catholics and a educated by a generation of lukewarm priests.

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