Monday, 28 November 2016

FR RORY COYLE'S FUTURE

FATHER RORY COYLE'S FUTURE



LET'S TALK TODAY ABOUT RORY COYLE'S FUTURE.

Of course the primary choice is Rory's to make - to try and return to priestly ministry or to leave the priesthood and take up a new career - and as a gay man - to find another man to love and marry.

But for the sake of our Blog today let us presume that Rory wants to return to priestly ministry.

If Rory wants to return to ministry I for one would support him in his decision if the following things happened:

1. RORY MAKES A FULL AND HONEST STATEMENT:

If I was Rory and wanted to return t ministry I would make a statement like this:

( A DRAFT STATEMENT)

"I have already apologised for my behaviour and I want to apologise again in the strongest possible terms and to say "Sorry" to my family, me fellow priests, my parishioners in Armagh and all those I have scandalised by my behaviour.




I have always known that my sexual orientation is "gay" or homosexual. It was my sincere intention to be a celibate priest. But I am afraid my human weakness, temptation, loneliness and very unwise thinking and decisions led me away from my resolve.

I offer no excuses for my behaviour. However I do feel that I owe you all an explanation. Sexually speaking I am a wounded or misled man. This comes from my experiences in childhood, adolesence, and in Maynooth where I was led into wrong ways by my own immaturity and selfishness and by being seduced by others - a priest and some seminarians.

Having become used to being sexually active my misbehaviour carried over into my priesthood. I have been unfaithful to my celibacy promise on many occasions, with many people and all fuelled by my explorations on the internet and mobile apps. Indeed I was a Grindr man. 

I was embarrassed to read on Pat Buckley's blog of the various activities I became involved in. All these things and details are true. I am embarrassed and ashamed. 



However as a young priest I want to rescue my vocation. I have already spent time in a sexual addiction clinic where I have begun to explore the beginnings of my behaviours and their eventual expressions. I will in some ways always be an addict. But my desire, with God's help and the help of others, is to be a recovering and non practising addict. I am doing this at present by engaging in one to one therapy which I expect to be involved in for a number of rears. I have also joined a SA (sex anonymous) group in Belfast which operates much like AA and it is my intention to attend my meetings and have long term if not life long support from this group - which is led by a professional. 




At this stage I am still very shaky and afraid. I am asking my bishop, my fellow clergy, and you the People of God, for a second chance. None of you are bound to give me this and I will understand if you are not willing.

I am hoping you will and I am promising you I will do all I can not to let you down. If I let you down an second time I promise you I will clear off and you will not see my heels for the dust. 

I am leaving the decision in your hands and I will await your response with embarrassment, fear and a little bit of hope.

With genuine remorse and begging your forgiveness,

Rory Coyle". 

Now, I believe if Rory made such a statement and meant it - it would change everything. We would not only have the OPPORTUNITY to forgive him - WE WOULD BE MORALLY / SCRIPTURALLY OBLIGED TO FORGIVE HIM AND GIVE HIM THAT SECOND CHANCE.

This leaves two questions looking an answer:

1. Is Rory truly sorry about what has happened - or is he a typical cleric who wants who is into manipulation, spin etc.




2. What game if any is Amy Martin with regard the Rory situation. Does he really want to resolve the Rory problem or is he into church politics, spin etc - like he and his fellows are doing in relation to Maynooth / Gaynooth ?

Rory's situation and other church scandals can ALL be solved and solved with integrity if we get a new openness, transparency, honesty etc.

The problem is that church politics and spin - and not the Christian Spirit - has been guiding the Catholic institution for more than 1500 years.  

In one sense - RORY's FUTURE - will be a very interesting insight into what - if anything - has changed.

Watch this space.........................................


FROM PAT TO RORY:


PICTURE ON MY 1976 ORDINATION CARD


Rory I imagine you read this blog. I also imagine that you are very angry with me and the Blog.

However, apart from this campaigning blog, there is another side to me - a pastoral caring side.

I have helped and supported many priests before.

If you need my help NOW - or at any time in the FUTURE - my door is ALWAYS OPEN.

Pat

07900 287283

45 comments:

  1. One does not have to be gay to cause hurt or damage people. Part of my healing process was to recognise the damage I caused because when I left sligo The way I did it could have been more measured and appropriate. Hindsight is a great judge. I would advise Rory to get appropriate trusted help in his decision making. Another big shock I got was lack of financial security when I left. (Who paid for all these escapades alleged or otherwise). I wish Rory well and hope he makes the appropriate choice

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    1. You are a great judge on this blog sean

      Delete
  2. +Pat,

    This is a very encouraging post to read today.

    I completely agree that a statement from Fr Rory roughly along the lines you suggest would be the thing to do if he intendeds to return to ministry and if all that has been alleged is, in fact, true. The suggestions you offer would require searingly honesty from him [the likes of which our Hierarchy have been absolutely incapable of] and a level of intentional public soul bearing that very few of us would have the guts for. I would also say that as I read your suggestions I thought about my own less than perfect life. I realised that whilst I am not a priest and have not done what has been suggested, I am very far from perfect and could could equally benefit from a real solid look at my life and how I treat others - no less is required by Christ from us all I guess.

    My only question with what you suggest Pat is that the statement ends with a proposal that the ultimate decision to return to ministry lies with others - who would they be? Would it not be enough that an honest statement and declaration of remorse and intent would be enough?

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    1. Realistically the ultimate decision does lie with others - bishop, fellow clergy, those he might minister to etc.

      Its like a tandem between Rory and others.

      He decides what he wants to do and awaits a response.

      Of course those of us who believe also know that God must be in there too - if you lije conducting the orchestra.

      Delete
  3. Irish Catholic Lad28 November 2016 at 10:01

    This is my first time commenting on this blog, although I've been reading it for quite a while. I don't agree with you on most things Pat, but I just wanted to say one thing here if you don't mind. Deep down in places we don't talk about at parties, most of us are well aware that many priests are same-sex attracted, but I firmly believe that the overwhelming majority of them are genuinely celibate. If he can't control his sexual appetites then the priesthood is not for him. I'm sure they get tempted just like everyone else, which is why it's imperative that parishioners pray for their priests every day, just the same as we would pray for our own father. Maybe the priests in my local parish are gay and maybe they're straight, but to be honest I don't care, I love them anyway.

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    1. Thank yoy for that simple and profound comment.

      You are right - a priest's sexual orientation is irrelevant.

      Its how he handles it and his life that matters.

      Delete
  4. I was one of the Mass goers who saw and greeted Rory when he turned up recently at the back of the 10 am Mass in Armagh Cathedral.

    He was dressed in full clericals and had grown a ginger beard.

    I approached him for two reasons.

    1. To genuinely give him a Christian greeting.

    2. To accertain his attitude.

    I was a little sad to find that he appeared to be exuding confidence, certainty etc.

    I would have been more moved had he exuded some sense of embarrassment and remorse.

    I would be afraid that if he is allowed back into the clerical saddle quickly and easily he will ride straight away back to the swinging doors of the Grindr saloon.

    Let us see, first, how much true remorse he really has.

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    1. Such a beautiful statement of genuine Christian faith from Irish Catholic Lad. Thank God for such as you, son.

      The observations of the Armagh parishioner at 10:08 are very telling. Here again, I believe, you have one of the truly genuine 'salt of the earth' Catholics that we are so blessed with in our parishes.

      Rory, he/she says, was "exuding confidence, certainty, etc.". He was dressed in clerics and had grown a beard.

      This is very very worrying and, in my opinion, is further evidence that the guy is sociopathic. Even his "apology", with its reference to him "completing post-graduate studies" is very telling.

      For some younger clergy, "post-graduate studies" are a sign of them being being "preferred" by their superiors, that they are on the "up and up", that their "star" is rising. That's how they think.

      And when archbishops and bishops show "preferment" to these young clerics by sending them for post-graduate studies in theology, canon law, Scripture, etc., the superiors know that their action will be definitely seen as "a sign of favour".

      Yes, Rory Coyle's reference to his "completing post-graduate studies" is extremely revealing of his mentality and how he views his failings.

      I personally believe that Rory, exuding confidence and certainty, is barkingly mad enough to see himself as still on "the up and up". He believes that his "star" will still rise.

      No doubt, he has enough people petting him and licking his "wounds" for him, that he would be back in that saddle of high clericalism tomorrow morning should he get the nod and, yes Armagh parishioner, he would be very soon back in Grindr saloon - hiding behind a ginger beard this time - looking once more to go a-felching and a-snowballing, with some boy to whom he takes a fancy.

      Rory doesn't have a clue as to the extent of the scandal he has given to faithful Catholics. The man suffers from a profound and utter lack of basic maturity. He should never have ordained in the first place which brings us once again, fair and square, to the abysmal, disastrous, spiritually ruinous "formation" techniques of the "formators" in Maynooth.

      Maynooth, quite simply, is a DISASTER and it is wreaking ruin on the Catholic Church in Ireland by sending out entirely unsuitable men as priests. I have no hesitation in saying that the ordination of some of these recent men is invalid. They lacked what the Church requires in its candidates for valid priestly ordination.

      Until the sickness in "Gaynooth" is properly treated, we will continue to lurch from scandal to scandal, with devastating fall out for faithful Catholics who are being repeatedly hurt by the Rory Coyles let loose to have their fun, by a gravely dysfunctional system of seminary training.

      There needs to urgent and radical intervention by Rome to avert an even greater spiritual catastrophe which, I believe is just around the corner.

      In fact, guys, get ready for it because it is going to happen. Rory Coyle, we all know, isn't on his own in Grindr land.

      Priest, Midlands.

      Delete
    2. Fr Midlands, Thank you and once again you hit a number of nails on the head.

      For Rory to be trying to represent the Sex Addiction Clinic as "further studies" is worrying. It means that he has NOT accepted the reality of the situation and as you say his ambition for a higher clerical career is not dented.

      Maybe he still fully expects a mitre?

      I too was disappointed by his attitude at the back of Armagh Cathedral.

      Why was he there in the first place? Was he testing what people's reaction to him might be?

      If so he is following some cunning plan.

      I'm afraid if he is playing such games then he should not be back.

      Apparently he had spent the night before his APPEARANCE being feted in the Armagh Presbytery by his colleagues there - including his co film maker Fr Thomas.

      What is going on !!!

      Delete
    3. Bishop Pat, I can almost hear the girly giggles, squeals, shrieks and titters, at Rory's party, with Long Thomas and co in the Presbytery, the night before he made his reappearance. They don't have a clue. It's all one big laugh from start to finish. And, yes, I have no doubt Ruairi Ruadh fully expects a mitre in the future as his due. The Irish Church is utter disarray.

      Delete
    4. I wonder who Fr. Rory's friend is, the one he wanted to join him for sex with CC. It seems from what CC has said that he knows the identity of this person and said "it doesn't take an idiot to work it out". Is there going to be another Outing sometime soon. Someone must be very worried at the moment. CC seems the type of person to do it in his own time.

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    5. Midlands priest, at 11:33, I agree with your entire comment.

      Reaction to Rory Coyle must not only be compassion-driven, but prudence-led. It would be highly imprudent (in fact it would be absolutely barking) to reinstate this kind if man in ministry. Who could trust him anymore. Trust is at the heart of priesthood. And Rory Coyle has wilfully forfeited that trust, as have Catholic prelates in general, especially here, in Ireland.

      Delete
  5. The apology by Rory was forced and not freely given, it's far from the truth let alone sincere and still people fall for it. I believe Amy and Rory are playing a cunning game. Here is how the apology should have been worded.

    Dear People of Armagh Parish, it's time for me to leave and be kicked out of the Parish as Archbishop Eamon has asked me to go. Archbishop Eamon said it would look better if I, Fr, Rory, should say that I asked him for a period of leave instead. It would look better that way. I apologise to you from my heart for being a kinky pervert engaged in unprotected sex, orgies in Dublin and London and being a dirty beast in general. I admit, like some of my friends, to have a liking for twinks. I particularly enjoy rimming, felching, snowballing, watersports, group fun and scat with them. So I apologise from my heart that I got found out and caught red handed because I was trawling on grindr for local twinks for sex. Since leaving in March 2016 I have been in a sex clinic in the USA but we will call it discernment to take the bad look of it. Everyone knows that sex therapy does not always succeed and that being surrounded by twinks on a daily basis may bring on a relapse at any time but please do pray for me in the meantime.

    I am deluded by saying I am making progress and I recently met Archbishop Eamon to discuss my next steps and perhaps sneek back into Armagh somewhere unnoticed. Eamon Squeeled, No, No, No, it is far too soon to be doing that.

    Eamon says what about slipping into the Cathedral after weekday Mass and see what reaction you get, grow a beard and you may not stick out so much. After all people might pity you but don't appear too cocky. The reaction was mixed and one old biddy gave me a piece of her mind before storming out but thank God they hadn't realised then the extent of the dirty perverse things I got up to . They thought I was looking for love with one person but more fool them. So Eamon told me to take more time away from ministry until the dust settles, even though I was ready to jump back into duties again and maybe become MC. But Eamon said no, he said to tell the people that you Fr. Rory have decided to take more time out of your own accord so that it doesn't look too bad. So keep me all in your prayers until I get the nod for me to sneek back in again and be reinstated. Love, Rory.

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    1. I wonder is it just a coincidence that the morning Rory 'reappeared' in Armagh after Mass, the permanent live internet broadcasting from the Cathedral was not working!! Surely it wasn't a carefully choreographed testing of the water!!

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    2. That's a very good question 13.07 because we have seen live internet connections go down recently in another parish in the Diocese under similar suspicious circumstances. It doesn't surprise me one bit how things can be choreographed as you rightly say or indeed manipulated.

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    3. Snowballs for me used to be those nice icing and coconut buns that were lovely with a cup of tea. They will never taste quite the same again.

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  6. Poor Enda Kenny, if we may shift the focus for a moment to an even more nauseous example of Irish immaturity. Did he really think he could distract the Vatican with chatter about a papal daytrip to Dublin in 2018? If the Secretariat of State is to be believed (and why not just this once?), they dragged his attention back to the Church's outstanding contribution to Ireland in terms of schools and hospitals and charitable works generally over the last two hundred years and more - and sent him off with a robust lecture on the right to life of every unborn child ringing in his ears.

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  7. The Pope will visit Ireland.
    It will be in 2018
    It will be in August. Many more things will come to pass before then - - -

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    1. Aren't you the clever clairvoyant. a proper Mystic Meg

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  8. Bishop Pat, can you just confirm in the interests of justice and Christian charity that you have seen evidence that Rory sent the messages as described in the past week (snowballing etc)? At this stage, we really do need a YES or a NO answer. People comment on your blog in good faith, and expect that non-offensive comment made in good faith are published. You make a big deal about free discussion but so far my query on this point has gone unpublished or unanswered. We need confirmation that the source of these stories is much more than an anonymous post by someone purporting to be the other party to the Grindr chat, particularly given your comments to MMM on 25 November that the first you had heard of the specifics was that same day. You have taken on the burden of exposing wrongdoing in the church and in many respects you have done a good job; I do not want to see that tarnished. Let's prioritise justice over a good story.

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    1. I saw evidence from CC about all the matters discussed this week with the exception ofn"snowballing" and "felching" which were new to me and I had to look them up.

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    2. Perhaps Rory could make a rebuttal on this blog himself regarding the snowballing and the other filth, that might help.
      Pat, I was just looking, isn't that very cosy photo of the Archbishop and Rory above, joined at the hip maybe!

      Delete
    3. Rory would be welcome to publish a FULL UNEDITED REBUTTAL on this blog.

      Yes, very cosy pic.

      Hope not too cosy !!!

      Delete
  9. Regarding ex-priests - Archbishop Diarmuid Martin has recently appointed a former priest as Director of Catechetics to the Dublin Archdiocese: Donal Harrington. Does this make sense? Would that not be the same as the Garda Commissioner appointing an ex-Garda, who left because he obviously lost interest in his job, as a director of a department within the Garda Siochana?

    Is it true Pat, that a former priest who when laicised takes an oath not to take-up any other ministry or position within the Catholic Church? As a Maynooth seminarian, some years ago, we listened to Donal Harrington, who authored certain books we studied, informing us of his opinions on celibacy, contraception, same-sex unions, women priests etc (the usual suspects!), which directly contradicted Church teachings and the Catechism which he now has been appointed to defend! Good luck with that one!

    Speaking of former priests, two come to mind, Donny (Donal) O'Neill, up to recently was the Senior Director of Formation in Maynooth for 6 years - this is the man with the responsibility to form men for priesthood when he obviously wasn't formed himself - he left this year for another love!

    Ronan Murtagh, (I think that was his name), the former Reverend Lecturer of Moral Theology - his morals went pear-shaped, as a celibate priest, when he also left Maynooth for another love. Of course Maynooth is a disaster - not waiting to happen but HAPPENING.

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    1. Donal Harrington left the priesthood to get married and he now has two teenage children - there is nothing wrong with leaving to get married. What is 'wrong' is that Maynooth (and others) cut him off when he left...

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  10. At the top of this blog it mentions 'feeling guilt'. 'Who said that 'GUILT' was a feeling? It may affect feelings but 'guilt' is a position a position a person finds themselves in before a judge. The reason why there is no condemnation, no judging to be guilty for those who are in Christ Jesus is because he bore our guilt on the cross. If you have so called 'guilt feelings' it's because you are living the wrong side of the cross. Not only that, he bore our weaknesses for us so that we could be set free from them. The old sin nature has been dealt with, and I receive in exchange a new nature, I become a new creation with the character and nature of the Lord himself. Sounds that Fr Rory needs to be 'born again', have his old nature dealt with, leave it at Calvary and now come into the presence of God and present himself as one who is alive from the dead. I cannot come into the presence of God with the old sin nature.

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  11. At least these priests had the honesty to leave and not live a double life. Some of the screeching so called twinks referred to above should have the decency to do the same.

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  12. Having been away for the weekend, and just getting back to this wonderful blog and all the stuff I've missed.
    Can I just say that reading here gives me mor fun than I ever thought possible.
    Please continue your wonderful daily novel, Pat, and look after your health as if you go...we are lost
    Love you Pat, you are the best.

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    1. CC or "Eoin", Bishop Pat is a very trusting man, and it is one of his better qualities. But he trusts too easily in people, and in this case he has chosen to publish and republish comments about fetching and snowballing (and urination etc (thought he has seen your evidence of that as I recall)).

      He has done this in good faith, despite having no evidence at all other than an anonymous post on this wall. Now I am sure you are a decent guy, and therefore to allow Bishop Pat to defend himself against his detractors, would not the decent (and easiest thing) be for you to forward the screenshots to Bishop Pat since you are already in touch with him?

      I am aware that there appears to be a technological issue today in that all messages do not appear to be making it to the publication stage ( :-) ) , but I do hope you will provide this proof to Bishop Pat who can then confirm to the rest of us.

      Just one thing - you had no idea about these sexual practices, and so you looked them up. Armed with this information, you decided that your ONLY condition for meeting him was a face picture, and you then continued to pester him for the face picture? I think you must have got the sequence wrong, as this rather suggests that you were quite into the alleged sexual practices?

      Also, maybe you could just clarify the earlier report here on THINKING CATHOLICISM back in May where you said that there was a whole lot more stuff, but you didn't save it. What exactly was it that you didn't save? You saved the stuff about felching and snowballing etc, but what was it that you didn't save?

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  13. Just so that everyone is aware, no one has made any rebuttals whatsoever to my true claims about Fr. Rory's explicit chats with me on grindr. Not Bishop Buckley, not Bishop Martin, not the Irish News or not even Fr. Rory himself. If there is a rebuttal then I can assure you I will publish them in a well known Sunday newspaper. I knew Fr. Rory first at St. Paul's in Bessbrook, he would come in to class and gave talks which were pretty boring to me.

    I don't go to Church or practice my faith now, however, I was confused with my sexuality as a teenage boy and I am not perfect in any way. I have meet many young lads on grindr in and around Armagh who are sexually active and like me, not Out to their parents and in some instances girlfriends.

    I met Fr. Rory on there, rather he sought me out instead, we had long chats and he sent me many explicit photos and the chats were even more explicit. I can assure you I had no idea some of the sexual practices he suggested but he was more than aware of them admitting he had done them during orgies in Dublin, London and on holiday in Portugal and in Rome. The penny dropped when I kept pestering him for a face pic as I don't usually meet people online who have a faceless pic and it was the only condition I made in meeting up with him. So the face pic arrived and then shock and horror. It was very much an OMG moment.

    I have sent only some of the explicit messages and photos to Bishop Buckley and the Irish News have been sent all the explicit messages and photos. T My details are with Bishop Buckley and the Irish News.

    I suggest to those of you posting on here who are clearly in contact with Rory and want evidence of the messages and evidence of the snowballing and felching to contact Noel Doran. If you don't know who that is, he is the Editor of the Irish News. If you ask nicely he might let you have access to them locked in his safe in Belfast.

    CC

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    1. Was there not a recent suggestion that The Irish News had given the material to Archbishop Eamon Martin?

      I wonder what Amy thought of the pics and the chat?

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    2. Could the pics not just be published on Bishop Pat's blog. Let those in the pews see the evidence

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  14. As a Gay man that has been feeling the sense of hurt and pain that Rory Coyle is going through due to the grave misjudged decisions that he made and also the onslaught of abuse subjected to him from you Pat and the many other bloggers that contuine to abuse him from behind a computer keyboard I read this article and feel a sense of compassion and little understanding from you Pat if indeed it is sincere and genuine.
    I've been concerned for some time now of your contuined and obsessive need to name and shame your fellow gay brother's in the name of attacking the Catholic Church.

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    1. Being gay does not give you a free pass from being criticised for wrong doing.

      The current problems facing the Catholic Church in Ireland are in part being caused by an out of control gay clique.

      I'm sorry if you do not like that.

      Delete
    2. Anon at 18:51, is your name Dafydd Thomas? LOL

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    3. No one is "abusing" Rory Coyle, anon at 18:51. That is typical of the mawkish self-pitying rubbish that some people like you love to wallow in.

      People are REACTING to Rory Coyle's BETRAYAL of his priesthood and everything for which he was supposed to stand.

      Coyle, you and the gang don't "get it".

      Delete
    4. 22:38 I sincerely hope that fault or failing never bestows your door or that of family or friend. You've the tone that "no one deserves a second change," not the way I live my life.

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    5. This is not about a second chance. This was a lifestyle choice for Coyle in complete contradiction of everything he is supposed to represent. He was like a mad thing for gay sex and its more extreme forms.

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  15. Having a lot of housework to catch up on, I'm still trawling through Friday's blog, now I'm killing myself laughing
    I thought , as a nurse, I knew most things, but snow will never look the same again.

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  16. Could you lot stop all this
    I've just read About using from behind Typed by18.51
    Was this a pun ha ha ha
    18.51

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    1. Ha ha! - - the power of punctuation - or lack of it!

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  17. Again your blog turns to obscenity and flith, sadly.
    Disappointed daily reader.

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  18. Let's get real here. Rory is not going to be forced out and he is not going to resign and move on. Life is too good as a priest - position, privilege, good living, money, not having to work too hard or be answerable to anybody. He is presently jumping through the required hoops in order to look as though he is penitent and intent on being reformed. In reality, he will simply carry on as before, just being a lot more careful and prudent and keeping out of the public eye. He will still have gay sex and relationships, and he will still remain as a priest. His parishioners will think all is well, and he will learn the language and the ways of seeming to be the holy priest so that he can convince them that he is so. But he will still have his fun. Reality. Let's not fool ourselves. And he will be tacitly supported by his brother priests, many of whom also live double lives. Perhaps even by his bishop, who at the very least will just turn a blind eye. Plus ca change, plus c'est la meme chose. As the French say.

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  19. We live in a substitute society. We substitute sex for love; alcohol and drugs for getting ‘highs’ yet from my own experience there is no high like the high of being filled with the Holy Spirit and you don’t get a hangover. In many areas of church life we substitute respectability for righteousness and we substitute culture for salvation, and we substitute religion for holiness. You are never going to get to Heaven based on your culture, education, and goodness or how respectable or intellectual or religious you are. You only go to Heaven based on the cross of Jesus Christ. Identification is the basic issue of Christianity When people in the Church only try to get people ‘involved’ in the church instead of getting them ‘identified’ with Christ, then we are building a 2nd storey on an empty space

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  20. If there is heaven, I will go with goodness, nothing wrong with being good
    It covers a multitude

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